


You Talk In Your Sleep

by FullmetalRinShingo



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Blood and Gore, Danse is everything, Dry Humping, Dry Orgasm, FO 4 Spoilers, Fallout 4 Spoilers, First Kiss, First Time, First Time Blow Jobs, Fluff and Smut, Friendship/Love, Gay Male Character, Grinding, Hand Jobs, M/M, Making Out, Male Homosexuality, Male Sole Survivor (Fallout), Masturbation, Paladin Danse (Fallout) - Freeform, Sexual Tension, Sole Survivor (Fallout) - Freeform, Spoilers, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-25
Updated: 2018-01-30
Packaged: 2018-05-08 17:02:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 30,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5505836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FullmetalRinShingo/pseuds/FullmetalRinShingo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Draic (dray-ick) and Paladin Danse have a sweet, romantic and caring relationship, but it's also difficult, demanding and stressful. Danse is a strong, confident man, but he's rather shy when it comes to Draic. This story is about the relationship they begin together after Paladin Danse is no longer Paladin."</p><p>This may not be explicit right off the bat, but as I continue to do chapters for this story, it <b>will</b> get there eventually.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Confession

**Author's Note:**

> If you're curious to see what Draic looks like or the layout that I have for the house in Sunshine Tidings, even though there's a description of it in the first chapter, you can view pictures of it on my tumblr. I'll be posting more pictures, too, as scenery may change and all that so you can see for yourself what I'm working around. I will continue to get screenshots, too, as the story goes on, and will continue to post them on my tumblr under the "YouTalkInYourSleep" tag.  
> rinntarouu.tumblr.com/tagged/youtalkinyoursleep  
> (heads up, a nsfw/yaoi blog if you stray away from the fallout4 tag)

_It's been about a week since I had last talked to Paladin Danse about what I had confessed to him.. Well, I guess he isn't a Paladin anymore. Now he's just Danse, corn farmer of Sunshine Tidings Co-Op, but he's still the man I fell in love with. We've been through the thick and thin together and we've seen it all.. The remorseful and murderous, the hopeful and fearful, the weak and strong, and ever since I met him, he's been at my side fighting for what he loves and never doubting it for a second. He's the strongest man I know, but.. He's different now. Over the months I've been traveling with him, he's been showing so much more emotion than I thought he had in him and I wondered if it was because of me, but that could just be my ego talking. He has a goal in mind and I completely understand his passion and his determination, but, without him being able to act on those strong passions anymore, he's now just a simple man who farms corn and he's forced to seek shelter and hide from everything that he loves because what he loves is now his enemy.. It breaks my heart seeing him doing nothing when the entire time that I've known him, he's always been doing **something**.. Something to better the cause for humanity. But, now with an entire faction against him, and a very strong one, at that, he doesn't stand a chance out there alone with the risk of being seen and his goal for humanity is now impossible to achieve on his own. Without him, the Brotherhood continues to strive to achieve greatness, the greatness that he desires so strongly, but they don't even bat an eye at the thought of him anymore, even after all that he's done for them. They'll get along just fine without him, but I'm not so sure how well he'll get along without **them**. I feel sorry for the man._

_Danse has been distant with me lately. I know he's never felt the feeling of love before, but does it really take this long for a Synth to realize such an emotion? Are they that different from humans, or is he just struggling to understand it like we all do at first? To me, it seems as if he's beginning to understand it the more and more we're around one another, but he's still hesitant. He's already completely absorbed the ability to be loyal, the ability to be honest and trustworthy and brave.. But love? That's a completely different story, and a completely different emotion than the need to be strong or honorary or trusting.. He has no idea what I want from him and he has no idea what the word 'love' entails when spoken to him because it's such a foreign subject, but I want him more than anything. I want to touch him in a way his body has never felt, I want to kiss every inch of him that's never been touched by anyone else and I want him all for myself. We've been together for a long while now and I quickly grew to love him, I just wonder what he thinks about me. I am a determined and passionate man, but I'm patient above anything else and I'll wait however long it takes for him to realize just how much I care about him. I want him to be my first relationship after the one I had with my wife two-hundred years ago. He's the only one besides her that I've felt so strongly about. When I told him I loved him, he was shocked and didn't quite know how to react, he was flustered and I could see that he liked that I was in love with him, but he didn't say it back.. Well, he didn't say 'i love you' back, but he told me he needed time to process everything and that's exactly what I'm giving him. With Shaun lost to the Institute, Danse is now my everything and I hope he realizes that. I need him to realize that. If not soon, then eventually, and I'll gladly wait for that day to come._

_It was late at night and I just got back from defending Finch Farm against Raiders. I was exhausted, but every time I came home to the Co-Op, I'd get my second wind knowing Danse was here waiting for me to return and I also grew a new sense of determination beside the one I had to protect my people.. Not the kind of determination I have to defend the innocents, not just to defend the weak and to progress Prescot and I's cause for the Minute Men and my loyalty to the Brotherhood, but the determination to finally hear what Danse has to say to me about what I had confessed. He sleeps in my green home at the very top of the settlement on the North wall, cozy and comfortable on the couch within the fortifications I've spent days and even weeks building around this settlement to protect him and the citizens housed here against everything that's out there. He truly doesn't realize yet just how amazing he is to me, but tonight, if he doesn't give me his answer, maybe I'll push him a little in the right direction and help him learn. Although I am patient, sometimes my determination to achieve certain things outweighs my ability to wait and I promised myself I'd at least get a kiss before I lay down to sleep tonight. This feeling of love, I know it's hard for him to absorb, but, I feel it so much to the point where it pains my chest when I think about it and I know he feels it, too, but he makes it so hard to act on.. I know he's scared of it, he's shy when it comes to true, heart-felt feelings and he seems to run away like a dog with its tail between its legs whenever I flirt with him or check him out without trying to hide it at all, but I also love how he reacts to it, too. I know this is the first time someone has confessed their love to him, but I'm going to teach him how to embrace it. He's an amazing man and I'm lucky enough to be the one to show him just how much he's worth saving. I could've died that night that I stood at his side in front of the elder, Author Maxson, but even if he'd of put a bullet between my eyes for defending Danse, I'd do it over and over and over again. Luckily, Maxson has a soft spot somewhere in that cold, dedicated heart of his and Danse and I were spared, but after that night, even if he said some pretty hurtful things to Danse, I have the utmost respect for him for giving Danse the second chance he well deserved._

_I approached the ruined deck outside of the green house at the North end and each step I took shook the ground from the weight of my X-01 power armor. I released myself from the armor's grip at the side of the house, a soft beep signalling I was exiting it and it opened up to let me out. I stepped out of it onto the dead grass, sporting a white tee, blue jeans and an Atom Cats jacket and I looked to my right, seeing Dogmeat sitting in the doghouse on the deck I had made especially for him to guard Danse and our home whenever I was gone._

"Hey, Dogmeat," _I cooed sweetly as I walked onto the deck, hearing him whimper in joy when he saw me and I could hear his tail smacking against the inside walls of his wooden doghouse._

"How's it going, buddy? Just checkin' in," _I asked as I bent down to pet his cheek as he continued to lie there._

"Good boy.. I'll take you out soon again, okay? I know how much you love coming with and finding Raider bones to bring home, eh?" _I complimented, hearing him whimper yet again in happiness as I pet behind his ears and underneath his collar._

_After petting my Sheppard, I stood up and stepped to the door of my home, lifting the Brotherhood flag that hung over the doorway for privacy and stepping in. A green junk chest to my immediate left supporting two suit cases full of armor and other citizen wear I've gathered over the months of wandering the Commonwealth with a Deathclaw Hand gently gripping the top suitcase for aesthetics. A small generator cooked in the left front corner with a wooden chest full of my extra power armor against the left wall to the generators immediate right. Stacked on top was the same chest containing nothing, I had no idea what to put in that chest yet, but sitting soundly atop that was an alien toy, a race car, a rattle and a toy truck. Next to the chests against the left wall was a cracked and crumbled blue crib I had dragged all the way from Sanctuary Hills to where we are now and I've completely filled it with teddy bears, Jangles the Space Monkey's, alphabetical blocks, rattles and baby bottles.. I know my son is physically older than I am now, but, it's still nostalgic and warming to see his old crib sitting in my new home. I was fond of thinking of him as still being a little baby again, such tiny hands that reached to grip the rocket pinwheel that spun over his head every night or trying to grip the teddy bears I dangled over him for amusement if he was unsatisfied with the pin-wheel.. No matter what his age was now, I still loved having his crib in sight. It brought me painful memories, but it also had its good memories with it. Danse doesn't much care for it and he thinks it's a waste of space, but he lets me keep it because he knows how much it means to me. Maybe one of these days I'll finally be able to part with it, but for now, it's going wherever I go._

_A flag of the Minute Men and America where placed randomly upon the walls, as well as other random paintings I had found throughout the Commonwealth. I liked to hang landscape paintings over the windows so I could act like we were in a much more beautiful place than constantly being reminded of the fallout.. Although, it was rather painful to then step out the door to see that we were still in the same hellhole we have been for the past two hundred years._

_To my immediate right, there was a magazine stand that held all of my comic books, a television next to that that still read "Stand By" on the screen at all times, and a small end table in the corner that housed a yellow table lamp that fit nicely upon it. Against the right wall was a junk trunk stacked on top of another that I stored my used holotapes, notes, and other stashed items that I didn't need any longer, yet wanted to keep. I'm a bit of a hoarder.. A couch then sat facing the television with an end table to its right, but behind the couch was my main stash._

_A large steel container sat against the farthest wall from the door between the right wall and the dysfunctional fireplace that sat dormant in the back-middle of the room. I stored all of my special weapons in the steel drawers, but it also held three coolers on top of it, each one containing different things. The first to the left held grenades, mines, Molotov's and more, the middle held all of my liquids, like Nuka Cola, Blood Packs, Whiskey, Bourbon, the works, and the last one in the corner held all of my food and other things I wanted to keep for myself and Danse and not share with the other settlers, like Deathclaw and Molerat meat, corn, tatos, and plenty more. The container that was nailed against the wall above my special weapons container was full of all of my favorite gear and nothing else, like my Mascot Helmet, Kellogg's Outfit, my Vault 111 suit, my Minute Men wear and a few other things that I favored above the rest._

_My bed was last to explain, a comfortable white mattress sitting on a steel bed frame with comfortable pillows sitting in the North West corner of my house with a Bobblehead station standing snugly between the bed and the non-functioning fireplace. My bed that I hoped would be housing two bodies tonight instead of my own all alone like it has been for months. My house was completely set up, organized, decorated and fortified, but the most amazing view I had when I entered my home was whenever I saw Danse waiting patiently for my return. He wore normal civilian clothes, a white tee under his worn red flannel and blue jeans with a crappy pair of boots, but I always thought he looked great no matter what he wore. Sometimes when I got home, I'd confuse him for one of the other settlers because I've been so used to seeing him in his power armor, but I'm slowly getting used to him being my height for a change and not having to break my neck to look up at him to talk._

_At first, he looked at me as if I was a Raider, a good grip on a wrench he had and ready to defend himself, but he then let down his constant guard when he realized it was me. I gave him a quick smirk, but I then stepped over to the chest to my immediate left and began putting away my belongings accordingly before we addressed one another. It's been a little awkward between us ever since I had confessed my love for him, he's been pretty shy and I think he's been avoiding me a little, but whenever he's ready to talk, I'll be here._

_The wait was beginning to drive me a little crazy. I've been home for about ten minutes already and we still haven't said a word to one another. I've been sorting through my inventory, even when I didn't need to, just to act like I was busy or to at least act like I wasn't constantly thinking about him and rushing him to talk to me.. If he still wasn't ready, then he still wasn't ready, but I hadn't forgotten the promise I had made with myself that no matter what happens tonight, I'd at least get a kiss, even if I had to steal it._

"Draic.. Do you have a minute?" _Danse eventually asked and I quickly looked up and behind me, grinning softly and nodding to his gesture._

"Of course. What's on your mind?" _I asked, wondering if he was finally able to talk about what I had confessed to him earlier this week and I was practically shaking I was so excited, but I hoped it wasn't that obvious._

"I-I just, uhm.."  _He hesitated, his view meeting the floor briefly before looking back up to meet my eyes again,_ "The corn is starting to look a lot better. They barely have any rads in them anymore from the soil,"  _he continued and my grin slowly fell from my lips. Well, that was unexpected. I didn't mean for it to be that obvious with how disappointed I was in what he **didn't** say, it was obvious in his own tone that that's not what he originally wanted to say, either, but I continued to try to be patient._

"Oh, uh.. That's really great news, Danse. You've been doing really well with taking care of them. Pretty soon there won't be  _any_ rads in them if you keep up with that green thumb of yours,"  _I replied with the grin I had lost just a moment ago, seeing the disappointment he had for himself now evident in not only his voice, but his eyes, as well. I then turned my attention back to the chest I was organizing and didn't speak any further, hearing him sigh softly to himself and fiddling around with whatever he was doing before._

_A few moments of silence later, the loud bang of the wrench he was holding met the top of my special weapons container, startling me a little and I looked over my shoulder at Danse with slight worry._

"No, that's not what I wanted to say,"  _he suddenly confessed and he was obviously frustrated. This was it, wasn't it? He was finally ready to talk to me and I hoped with every ounce of my being that he'd tell me that he feels the same as I do. I've been waiting for this moment ever since we met._

"Danse, are you all right?"  _I asked, turning away from my task of pointless organization and taking a few steps in his direction._

"No, I'm not.. I can't stop thinking about everything that's happened, everything that we've been through together, everything that I've lost.. In a matter of hours, my entire world has been flipped upside-down and I don't have the slightest clue as to what to do about it. I started out as nothing, and what I've became in the end was nothing, even after all that I've tried so hard to be. I've got nothing to show for it. I went from protecting this world against the dangers it holds, being a part of something important and dedicating my life to fight for what's right, but now all that I'm doing is sitting on my hands and collecting fucking corn. How can I go from being a Paladin of the Brotherhood to a goddamn corn farmer?"  _He expressed with anger and his frustration radiated off of him as I watched him reach up and rub the bridge of his nose._

_I've been selfish.. A week ago, the same night that he was stripped of his rank and thrown to the Commonwealth like a sick dog by Maxson, I had told him how I felt about him, but all that I've been thinking about is what he might respond with in the hopes he'd love me back. I've completely forgotten about how much he could be hurting, how lost he must be without a mission to carry out or how difficult it is for him to be forced to get to know a life he didn't have such a passion for as he did when he was fighting for the Brotherhood. I haven't been there for him like I should've been this past week, I thought he needed space and I gave it to him, but what he needed was someone to talk to._

"I'm so sorry, Danse,"  _I replied and he looked to me as if he didn't understand._

"For what? None of this is your fault and it wasn't my intention to make you feel like it was,"  _he explained, but I still felt bad._

"I know, but.. I'm just sorry. All of this must be really hard for you and I understand that getting used to all of this is going to be difficult, but if you ever need anything, anything at all, you know I'm here for you, right?"  _I asked and I saw the faintest smirk on his lips before he quickly got rid of it and nodded._

"Yes.. I know that. It's kind of why I felt the need to get that off of my chest. Thank you for listening,"  _he answered and my lips curled into a gentle smile._

_I watched him lean back against the fireplace and cross his arms, knowing he was still a bit troubled by his thoughts and I knew he still needed more support that just me saying 'sorry'. My feet took over and had a mind of their own, watching Danse's eyes get more and more curious as to what I was up to with each step I took closer to him, but I stopped about a foot away, giving him enough space to be comfortable, but close enough for either of us to reach one another if the moment called for that space to be filled._

 "You're not 'nothing' and you've got plenty to show. Yeah, you farm corn, but it's not like that's a bad thing, because you're growing and providing food for people who have none, you're helping the people of the Commonwealth get back on their feet and start living. You still believe in the Brotherhood's cause and nothing's going to change that, you just can't fight for that cause  _with_ them anymore, that's all. You're freelance now, just like me. Think of it as an early retirement and you're your own man now, no more needing to follow orders or carry out missions that you think are wrong just because someone of a higher rank is making you. You're a free man now, Danse, you can think freely and _live_ freely and do whatever you want. Embrace it,"  _I replied and I could tell he was testing how genuine my words were by reading my eyes for a short moment, but he soon nodded in understanding and his view then met the floor. It's as if he believed me and knew everything I said to be true, but he still couldn't accept it just yet._

"Hey,"  _I caught his attention again, my right hand reaching for his face and my thumb gently caressed his cheek back to his ear. He dropped his arms from being crossed and he stared at me nervously, standing up a little more straight as if he was preparing himself for something. Or, maybe I was making him uncomfortable, I wasn't sure, but I continued anyhow._

"I'll help you through this, Danse. You don't have to hide who you are from me and you don't ever have to worry about me abandoning you like the Brotherhood did. I care about you too much and I'll never let anything bad happen to you. I'll always be at your side, I promise,"  _I assured him, watching his brows furrow gently with a touched sentiment evident._

"I love you,"  _I added, a little quieter than the rest of my words, but he heard it none the less._

_I watched as his view bounced up and down between looking at my lips and looking at my eyes, knowing he was expecting me to kiss him after my words, but I honestly wasn't sure if he wanted me to or if he was just expecting me to and I didn't even know if he'd like it or not. I had no clue how he felt about me. I had a plan to steal a kiss before the night was over, but now I can't even seem to push myself to do it even when it's the perfect time to try. The silence that fell over us after those three little words didn't help, either._

_I let out a quiet sigh, pulling my hand away from touching his face and I smiled awkwardly,_ "I'll, uh.. I'll be back later, I'm going to go for a walk,"  _I told him, turning away and walking to the door._

 _I_ _flipped the Brotherhood flag out of my way a little more aggressively than I intended to, but it was hard to hide all of this pent up energy and frustration, not to mention sexual frustration that was getting more and more difficult than anything else to keep dormant. It was dark along the outskirts of the settlement, but the moon did a good job of lighting a path for me and before I could even get too far from our home, I heard Danse call to me and I stopped._

"Draic, wait,"  _he said with slight urgency and I looked back to the doorway of our home, seeing him flip up the flag and looking around for me and when I caught his eye, he rushed off of the deck and stopped a few feet away from me._

"What's wrong?"  _I asked, hoping he followed me so I could hear him finally tell me how he truly feels, but with how slowly things are going between us, I doubt it's what he wants to tell me._

"N-Nothing, I just.. You don't have anything with you and you know how dangerous it is out there, especially at night.. At least take Dogmeat with you,"  _he suggested and I smiled warmly at his concern for me, but I wasn't having it._

"Nah.. He's not the one I want close to me right now,"  _I implied and I could tell from the look in his eyes that he knew exactly what I meant,_ "I'll be back later.. Go get some sleep."

"I won't be able to until you're back safely,"  _he added and I sighed heavily. He tries so hard to dance around the subject that I more than obviously want to talk about, but he's never able to quite get there and it was beginning to frustrate me. Was he playing stupid, or did he really want to avoid the subject?_

"Then stay up.. Makes no difference to me,"  _I replied, watching his brow curve up with worry._

"What's wrong with you? ..Why are you acting like this?"

"Why do you  _think,_ Danse? Have I not made it _blindingly_ evident how I feel about you? I know you need time to think about it and to decide what you want and I'm trying to be as patient as possible, but it's just hard, you know? I love you so much, but I can't do a damn thing about it and it's driving me nuts! It's nothing against you, it's all me and I thought I could be patient and I'll continue to be no matter how long it takes, I'll wait forever if that's how long you need, but when I need to get away from you, it's only because I'm losing control and I don't want to push you or force you to do anything, hence why I'm trying to get the hell away from you right now.. So, if there's nothing else, I'd really like to go take that walk now," _I replied, my breathing a little heavier from my angst and frustration building up again._

_Danse was silent for a moment and just as I was about to turn and walk away through the dark, putting off talking about this yet again, I watched him step closer to me and he reached to grab my right hand with his left._

_He looked down at his hand holding mine,_ "Is that why you didn't kiss me inside? You truly have no idea how I feel about you?"  _He asked, looking up to me._

 "How could I when you won't talk to me?"  _I asked with defeat in my voice and I could tell he understood how I felt._

"I-I'm sorry.. I'll try to make it clear for you now,"  _he answered._

_With his right hand, he reached up and slid it passed the side of my neck to my nape, pulling me in slowly with our eyes still open before finally shutting them when our lips met. I inhaled strongly through my nose upon contact, still shocking me that this was finally happening even when I saw it coming and I let a quiet, slightly quivering moan escape behind my lips on exhale. He had these thick, soft lips that I often fantasized about and I always wondered what it would be like to kiss them. I knew it would be everything that I wanted it to be, but I didn't expect it to hit me as hard as it did. After a long moment, I removed my hand from his and lifted my arms, wrapping them around his neck and I attempted to make the moment more passionate. As we kissed again and again, I tried to make it even better and he hesitantly parted his lips when I attempted to add my tongue. I thought it was adorable with how foreign I knew this all was for him. Even though he initiated it, he had no idea what he was doing and it was obvious he was following my every move. He didn't even know where to put his hands, feeling him barely touching my hips, then up to my waist, but never wrapping around me like I wanted._

_We made out in the dark for a few minutes and as much as I wanted to keep going, I knew that this is where I should stop with him or else I really would be rushing him too quickly into something I knew he wasn't ready for. Hell, I don't even know if I'm ready for it. At a good time to stop, I pulled my tongue out of play and kissed him gingerly a few more times before pulling away completely. I heard him breathing heavily and even I was panting softly, keeping myself close enough to him to touch the tips of our noses. His eyes remained shut for a long moment after our first kiss, a smirk forming on my lips as he seemed to be regaining some sort of consciousness._

"You okay?" _I asked with a quiet laugh and he finally opened his eyes._

"Yeah, I-I just wasn't expecting it to be as great as it was,"  _he replied. Most could take that as a slight insult, but I knew he didn't mean it in that sense._

"You better not have done that just because you knew I wanted to,"  _I warned with a grin and he shook his head._

"No.. I've wanted to for a while now, I just didn't understand why until I realized it was love,"  _he replied in a somewhat bashful manner and I pulled back just slightly so I could see his face clearly._

"Wait, you.. You love me?"  _I asked with hope, seeing him grow more shy with each second he hesitated, but eventually he nodded, confirming it._

"Please, say it.. I want to hear it,"  _no, I needed to hear it._

"..I love you,"  _he answered and it felt like a weight that I've been carrying around with me that's only been getting heavier was finally lifted from my chest._

 _I_ _felt like I could breath again and I felt so alive after his words. We finally reached the point I've been wanting to be at for so long and it felt exhilarating. I tightened my arms grip around his neck and pushed my lips into his once again, needing another kiss like the one we just shared and especially needing another after what he had just confessed. It took a long time and a lot of patience, but he was finally all mine and as I told Danse earlier at the house, I'd never leave his side and I'd never let him leave mine. No matter what, he was stuck with me and there was nothing that could take him away from me now._


	2. Morning Delight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two weeks after finally figuring out their feelings for one another, Draic and Danse's relationship has only just begun, but Draic's ready to take things to the next level.

_I slowly opened my eyes and I was face to face with Danse, sound asleep lying next to me and I smirked softly, reaching up and gently running the back of my index finger down his cheek. It had been a little over two weeks since he had finally told me how he felt and we've been sleeping in my bed together ever since instead of him shacking up on the couch every night with mixed feelings. Now, even when everything was clear and out in the open, we've still only kissed and slept together in the sense where it was **only** sleeping.. Don't get me wrong, I loved every second we spent together and finally being able to kiss him whenever I wanted made me insanely happy, but with each kiss we shared, it got more and more difficult to try and calm myself down from getting too aroused and wanting to go further. I knew he wasn't ready to be intimate with me yet, but he was slowly getting there. I could see it in his eyes every time he looked at me that he wanted it just as much as I did, but he was more reluctant than I was in admitting it._

_I brought my right hand away from his face down to his hip, slowly lifting his red flannel and white tee and I felt his skin underneath his troublesome clothes. He was so warm. I let my hand hang there a moment as I looked up at his sleeping face again, wondering if I should kiss him or let him continue to sleep.. For how slow things were progressing with us, I wanted to make things go further every single time we were alone together and this was a perfect opportunity. **Every** morning like this was the perfect opportunity because I never knew what missions Preston had for me or otherwise that would usually always take up my whole day and I spent a lot more time away from Danse than I ever wanted to. Danse needed time to confess his love to me and he needed time to adjust to my touch, but every day we were getting closer and closer to being intimate and I was on the edge of my seat waiting for him to be ready. Before I head out for the day and be deprived of him, I hoped he was feeling a little open minded this morning so we could do something that would hold us over for a while and keep us from missing one another too much while I was away._

_Danse was so shy consciously, but sleeping like this, his subconscious brain always reacted exactly how it should to everything that I did and although I felt a little guilty playing with him in his sleep, it was just too fun. I slid my entire body closer to him, keeping my hand stationary on the skin of his hip and I leaned in, kissing the tip of his nose before maneuvering my neck at a certain angle to reach his lips._

_I kissed him softly, just a peck._

_No reaction._

_I kissed him again, leaving my lips there for a few seconds before pulling them away._

_Nothing. Sound asleep._

_**Come on, Danse-**  I thought to myself **-w** **ake up and kiss me.** _

_I_ _leaned in, kissing his lips yet again._

_Still nothing._

**_Jesus, this guy is out cold when he doesn't have anything to wake up for._ **

_Besides kissing him, I kept my view on his shut eyelids as I then let my right hand travel further down the skin of his hip, sliding my fingers beneath the jeans he slept in, then under his underwear and slid it over his left ass cheek, gripping it gently under all of the fabric and his hips then jerked slightly and he let out a quiet moan. Finally, he was reacting to it, even if he wasn't awake._

_I lifted myself from lying down and propped myself up on my left elbow, bringing my lips to the left side of his neck and I kissed him softly a few times as I continued to grip his ass that I still held firmly in my right hand and I then pressed the front of my hips against his. I could feel him getting hard in his sleep against my own excitement as I continued to lick and gently bite his neck, my right hand gripping his ass firmly again as my hips pushed against him and I heard him moan once more as he was now beginning to wake up._

_I pulled myself away from his neck and the moment he opened his eyes, I pushed my lips into his and he inhaled sharply at finally realizing what I was doing. His left hand reached up and gripped what he could of my short black hair as I pried my way into his mouth with my tongue, kissing him passionately as I continued to grip and massage his ass. But, sadly, when he finally realized where my hand was as he woke up more, he pulled away quickly and brought his hand that was gripping my hair in pleasure to my chest that pushed me away. This also caused my hand to come out from underneath his jeans and lie patiently on his hip again where I had started._

"W-What are you doing?" _Danse asked nervously and I smirked._

"What? I'm just touching you. Keep kissing me," _I replied, pushing my lips back into his and kissing him a few more times, but I could tell he still wasn't comfortable with where my hand was on the skin of his hip just by the way he kissed me in return. It was so obvious. I pulled away from Danse and looked at him questionably._

"What's wrong?" _I asked, leaning back in to kiss his chin and following his jawline as I pecked._

"N-Nothing, I just.. You caught me off guard waking me up like this."

"I've woken you up like this plenty of times.. I want to touch you," _I replied simply, pushing my lips into his again and pushing my fingertips back down underneath the edge of his jeans, but I felt his hips tense up when I did this, so I stopped my hand underneath the fabric and left it there, but pulled my lips away to look at him._

"Come on, Danse.. I want you so bad, don't you want me?" _I asked, seeing his cheeks as red as the sun that was rising and his gaze met my collar bone and stayed there. This is where it ended, wasn't it? Just like every other time I've tried this._

_I sighed heavily._

"..I'm sorry,"  _I_ _reluctantly admitted defeat, removing my hand from underneath the fabric of his jeans and I rolled onto my back, staring up at the ceiling._

"I didn't mean to scare you awake or whatever it is that I did," _I said in remorse._

"You didn't _scare_ me awake, just.. Caught me off guard," _he repeated shyly, obviously not liking being viewed as a coward and I chuckled._

"Right, you said that already,"  _I humored him,_ "Well.. I'm going to get some more sleep since I have the time.. I'm sorry for waking you up,"  _I added, then rolling onto my right side with my back now facing Danse._

_Who was I kidding? There was no way I could sleep, not a chance in hell when I had this bad of an erection that didn't seem to want to go away even with fully knowing that I had been turned down. Maybe I could somehow sneak off to the large shed I built behind the house where I stored all of my power armor and get myself off so I could focus on the days agenda, but I don't know how I'd get away with that with over twenty people at the settlement.. I couldn't be alone for more than ten minutes without someone complaining about something or asking me to fix something or deal with someone.. I'd be interrupted for sure. This morning turned out how I thought it would, but the effort is what counts, right?_

_I don't even know anymore.._

_I knew that Danse was wide awake now, I had done a good job making sure of that. Strangely, however, usually whenever he'd turn me down, he'd get out of bed right away to put some distance between us so we could both gather our senses, but the mattress didn't creak in the slightest as he remained lying beside me. I wanted to turn around and check over my shoulder to see what he was doing, but I was too nervous. I even started to feel a little guilty about doing this to him so often, hating that I couldn't be the patient man I was only when it came to Danse, but he can't keep this up forever, could he? I sighed heavily as I adjusted my body a little, trying to get myself comfortable even with my obvious hard-on. I should really just take the damn hint and stop trying to force him, he'll be ready whenever he's ready and I'm sure it'll be amazing when it finally happens, but.._

_**No. I'm patient. I can wait for him. I can wait.** I told myself over and over again._

_Suddenly, to my surprise, I felt Danse's hand on my left shoulder blade, feeling it slowly slide down my back, over my waist and down to my hip, then stop. I felt his weight shift in the bed, the front of his body being pushed up against the back of mine and when he gripped my hip that he held strongly in place, he pulled me back as he thrusted forward and I could feel against my ass from what I was doing to him before how he still had a slight erection. I let out a soft 'mm' at just the thought of there being no clothes keeping us apart, but I quickly got rid of that thought of him fucking me and paced myself._

_**He literally just started this two seconds ago and you immediately jump to that? Calm down.. Calm down and see where this goes, because it's not going** _ **there _yet.._**

_I reached my left hand back, intertwining my fingers with his as he still held my hip and I gently pushed back against him, already feeling him getting harder against my ass and I still tried to remain in control of my enthusiasm for what was happening. His lips met the back of my neck, kissing me slowly over and over and chills ran up my spine as I shut my eyes so I didn't have focus on anything else but his touch. I wondered what had changed his mind, but either way, I didn't care. I was just that glad he did._

_Danse continued to grind himself gently against me, trying to hold myself in place so he could go as rough as he wanted, if he wanted to, making it obvious that I was loving what he was doing and didn't want him to stop. He massaged my hip with every grip and release of his hand and already I was beginning to breath a little heavier, my mind going back to where I didn't want to let it, but it couldn't be helped. I wondered if he'd be this gentle during sex, wanting to make love and take our time, or would he be as confidently driven like he was during our missions and go hard, be relentless, lack mercy and fuck me until I couldn't see straight? The very picture of it gave me chills down my spine all over again._

_As I continued to push back against every thrust forward his hips carried out, I felt his left hand let go of mine and release my hip, his fingertips then sliding under the bottom of my white tee and the feel of his warm hand against my skin made me quiver a little. His hand slid down the center of my abdomen, my body getting more and more excited the lower he ventured and when his fingertips reached the edge of my jeans, I waited with anticipation to see if he'd go any lower like he knew I wanted him to. His fingertips then played with the button and I was unsure if he couldn't undo it himself one handed or if he was just teasing me, but it didn't matter. There's no way that I couldn't love any of this._

_Once he finally undid the button, he pulled down my zipper and his hand came back to my skin, slowly dipping his fingers beneath the fabric of my jeans and just by the feel of how his hand stopped momentarily told me he wasn't expecting me to not be wearing any underwear. I grinned as I felt the bulge under his pants get harder against my ass instantly at his new discovery and I could feel how his light panting against my neck was getting heavier and filling with a deeper desire for me in every breath that he took. Danse started out slow, the tips of his fingers and thumb starting at the base and sliding delicately all the way up my shaft and pulling me out from under my jeans. My left leg gently shook as Danse did this two more times, the teasing beginning to be a little overwhelming and I was worried I might come just from him barely touching me.. However, the second that he took hold of my cock more firmly, I let out a quiet, quivering moan and lost myself as he began stroking me slowly._

"F-Fuck, Danse.. That feels so fucking good,"  _I let out with a staggering exhale._

_Behind me, I could feel Danse sit up and he propped himself on his right elbow, sliding his right arm between the mattress and under my neck and he took hold of my jaw, forcing my head up and his lips, tongue and teeth toyed with the side of my neck all the way up to my earlobe. I quivered under his hot breath against my ear, surprised at this sudden roughness that took him over when I'd normally only ever seen it on the battlefield. I loved his passion and aggression against our enemies, but man, was I especially loving it now when he used it on me._

"General, are you awake yet? I've just gotten word that a settlement is in need of our help. It's the Red Rocket Truck Stop," _I heard Preston call to me from the front of our home and I know Danse heard it, too. Thankfully, I could tell from where Preston's voice was that he wasn't on the deck or close enough to hear anything that was happening right under his nose._

"Shit,"  _I expressed angrily in a whisper,_ "Danse.. Stop,"  _I added, wanting to finish this after dealing with Preston, but Danse had something else in mind._

"No. Just be quiet," _he whispered roughly into my ear and instantly my body was overwhelmed with pleasure from his command._

_The right hand of his that gripped my jaw and held my head up quickly slid over my mouth and kept me from letting out anymore words or obvious moans, pulling my head up even more until I could feel the bone on the top of his shoulder against the back of my skull. I reached back with my left hand, gripping his ass outside of his pants for something to hold onto as I assumed whatever he had planned was going to rock me harder than I have been in over two hundred years. I breathed heavily through my nose, his hand that continued to stroke me remaining relentless as he quickened his pace while gripping a little harder and I could feel my body heating up to a point where I was worried I might pass out, but God was this hot._

**_Was that the first order the ex-Paladin has disobeyed since he had joined and been relieved from the Brotherhood?_ ** _Just the thought of it being possible and the thought of it being with me turned me on even more._

"He's not here," _Danse_ _called out to Preston,_  "He went out for a quick patrol. He should be back shortly,"  _Danse answered for me, his lips then coming straight back to my neck and I could feel myself about to come._

"Oh, okay. Thanks, Danse. Let him know I'm looking for him, all right? I wish he wouldn't go off like that alone,"  _Preston replied._

"Yeah, me, too. But, don't worry. I'm confident that he can handle himself. He'll be coming soon,"  _Danse added and his lips came back to my ear._

"Won't you?"  _He more demanded than asked and I would nod strongly with confidence, if only I was able to._ _I never imagined I'd like being bossed around so much like this with my reputation, a seemingly unwavering soul that was meant to lead, but if anyone could get away with giving **me** orders on top of me loving it like mad, it was Danse. Only Danse. _

_Now aware of Preston's presence, we heard his footsteps getting quieter and quieter until they were non existent and when we knew he was finally gone, we got lost in one another again. Danse's right hand then turned my face towards him and the second he removed his palm from suppressing my moans, his mouth engulfed mine and he kissed me passionately for the last few seconds I was able to hold out. I let out a large, muffled moan the moment that I came, gripping his ass and pulling him as hard as I could against me and Danse then did the same deep, pleasureful moan as he pushed hard against me, himself. My entire body shook, wave after wave of pleasure coursing through me and I pulled away from the kiss so I could gasp for the air I so desperately needed._

_I felt his lips come back to my neck as I panted heavily, but his kisses were now lengthened, soft, not aggressive or rough like they were a second ago and they helped calm my quaking body as his left hand slowly let go of me when I was finally done coming. Still struggling to catch my breath, I looked down and saw my much needed release sprayed over the mattress and Danse's left hand slid up and under my white tee. He held me tightly as his long, sensual pecks against my neck continued, each one filled with more love than the last and I could finally breath again without too much trouble._

"Fuuuuck.."  _I let out with the final exhale I needed to get my breathing back to normal and I lie there lifeless, my eyelids heavy and I reached down to tuck myself back into my pants. I let my arms drop back down onto the mattress, still taking a moment to try to remember my own name after everything that just happened and Danse held me a little tighter._

"Did you enjoy that?"  _Danse wondered and I scoffed._

"Is that even a real question?"  _I asked lazily in return and I could feel he was smiling as he kissed my neck again._

"Oh, by the way,"  _Danse quietly continued,_ "Preston's looking for you,"  _he joked and I couldn't help but chuckle softly under my breath._

_With a still weak body, I turned to lie on my back and I looked up at Danse who was looking down at me with a proud grin on his lips. He had the same look in his eyes he always gave me after both of us realized the other was alive after a rough encounter we thought we might not make it passed. A look filled with peace, love and relief. He treated giving me a hand job like it was a life or death situation and I found that oddly satisfying, but I couldn't even begin to imagine how he was going to handle fucking me for the first time and daydreaming about it momentarily made my cock twitch with excitement. I reached up with my right hand, caressing his cheek with my thumb briefly before bringing my hand to the back of his head and pulling him down to me for a quick kiss._

"What changed your mind?"  _I asked on a more serious note,_ "Because, that was-"  _I shook my head in mere disbelief just thinking about it,_ "That was-"

"Exhilarating?"  _Danse finished my sentence and I smirked._

"To say the least,"  _I replied and he seemed happy with my response, but by how his grin slowly faded from his lips, I knew he was getting back to being serious about the question I asked._

"I don't know,"  _he addressed,_ "Being with you has just made me realize that I never want to be alone again.. I like when you're this close and I'll do anything to keep it that way,"  _he replied and I was touched by his words that I knew were genuine._

"Besides,"  _he continued,_ "You looked like you were in pain earlier and I wanted to remedy that,"  _Danse added and I smirked again._

"That obvious, huh?"  _I asked and he chuckled as he nodded._

"Well,"  _I spoke, hoisting myself up and swinging my leg over him and his eyes seemed to dart open in surprise as I quickly straddled him._

"You're turn,"  _I said with a sense of excitement and I reached down to the button and zipper of his pants._

"N-No, that's not necessary, r-really," _he seemed to panic a little,_ _trying to stop me from undoing them, but I had already got them both undone before he could even grab my wrists._

_Once I opened his pants, I froze momentarily when I noticed the front of his underwear was wet._

_**He came already?** _

_I quickly looked up to him, Danse covering his beat red face with his hands in embarrassment._

"You.."  _I was at a loss for words.._

"..Really?"  _I questioned with a proud grin and he removed his hands from his face, putting them to the front of my thighs and trying to push me off of him, but I wasn't going anywhere._

"Get off,"  _he insisted._

"It seems you and I  _both_ have,"  _I joked and he sat up, trying a little harder with a lot more of his strength to push me off and causing him to actually succeed this time. But, I quickly stopped him by placing my hands on either side of his neck more towards his nape for something to hold onto and I tried to stay put in his lap as hard as I could._

"Hey, hey, hey, I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean for it to seem like a bad thing.. Calm down, all right?"  _I asked and the strength his arms used to push me off of him began to lessen._

"I like that you came,"  _I assured him and he looked to me with a questioning brow._

"Really?"

"Yeah. Definitely,"  _I said in a softer, quieter tone, sliding my arms around his neck and pulling him close,_ "I love that you did.. Enough so that it makes me a excited to see what sex is going to be like with you if giving me a hand job caused you to come without me even touching you,"  _I teased, seeing his face turn red all over again and I quickly pushed my lips into his before he could hide, needing another long moment with him before I knew I needed to head out._

"General, are you back from your patrol yet?"  _Preston came out of fucking nowhere again, nearly scaring the hell out of me and I pulled away from Danse's lips. I cleared my throat before addressing him._

"Yes, I'm back, Preston. Danse informed me of the settlement and I'll be out in a moment. Wait for me by the Co-Op sign above the barn,"  _I instructed._

"As you wish, General,"  _Preston replied and I waited a few long seconds to make sure he was gone before turning my full attention back to Danse.. However, when I looked to him, I was curious as to why his expression didn't seem pleased in the slightest._

"That man needs something to do besides interrupt you every morning at the break of dawn,"  _Danse expressed and I dared to wonder if he was jealous, a sly grin forming upon my lips._

"You can't blame him.. He has no idea just how important my mornings are to me,"  _I replied softly, leaning in and kissing him one last time before getting up from his lap and standing from the bed._

_I stepped over to the steel cabinet hanging on the wall that held my favorite clothing, pulling out my Minuteman General outfit as well as my hat to go with it. After fixing my open fly, I threw on my white button up vest, a blue chest plate sporting a white star in the center, then put on the dark blue coat that brought it all together. I grabbed the belt for it that acted as a bullet-less bandolier and put it over my head, letting it rest on my left shoulder and I put my right arm through it so it crossed over my chest and hung down to my right hip. My view then went over to Danse still sitting up in bed, catching him looking me up and down._

"Like what you see?"  _I asked with a raised brow and a cocky smile and his innocent, doey brown eyes then shot up from my body to my blues, slightly embarrassed that I had caught him._

"I always thought you looked good in that,"  _he admitted, the edge of his lips twitching up into a brief smirk._

"Oh yeah?" _I asked and he nodded with pink cheeks,_  "Well, then.. When I get back, I just might let you take it off of me,"  _I added and his face went red as I snickered from his reaction._

_I stepped up to my weapons case under the hanging steel cabinet and pulled out my Quick .50 caliber rifle before beginning my trek with Preston. I didn't think I needed anything more powerful than that for some raiders or ghouls or whatever it was that was bothering the Truck Stop. I looked over my shoulder at Danse as I grabbed a few stimpaks for the road, tucking them into my coat pocket and I paused when I noticed him staring off towards the floor._

"Hey,"  _I caught his attention,_ "Do me a favor?"  _I asked and he nodded,_ "Go out and get a Stag for me, will you? I got a plan to hold up the story you told Preston. There's some south of here close by and you can borrow one of my helmets, even though you probably won't be seen, anyhow, but.. Just to be careful,"  _I instructed and he nodded again in acknowledgment to my words before going back to staring at the floor._

_I unfroze from my position and stepped over to the top suitcase near the front doorway, going through it a little before finding what I wanted and I turned to face Danse._

"Heads up,"  _I said quickly, throwing a pair of clean underwear at him and it hit him in the face before falling into his hands over his lap._

 _I chuckled softly,_ "You need a new pair, right?"  _I hinted with a grin and he smirked slightly to my words as he barely held them in his lap, his view them going back to the floor and his smirk quickly leaving his lips._

 _I_ _grew concerned with how he was acting._

"Danse.. What's wrong?"  _I asked, propping my rifle up against the wall before approaching the side of the bed._

 _I reached out my left hand to gently grab his chin and I made him look up at me,_ "Tell me."

"It's nothing.."

"Don't give me that. Tell me what's on your mind,"  _I insisted and he hesitated a moment before confessing._

"..I just.. I want you to be careful,"  _he replied, making sure to always remind me of this since he couldn't travel safely at my side anymore with the Brotherhood constantly buzzing overhead._

"I always am. I won't be gone long, either.. It's the Truck Stop just North of here, not far at all. I''ll be back before bed,"  _I assured him._

 _Danse reached up both of his hands to gently grab my hips and pull me a little closer,_ "I know, but.. If anything happened to you.. I honestly don't know what I'd do,"  _he expressed with a sense of worry and urgency that I had never seen before,_ "I-I love you,"  _he admitted and I couldn't help but smile._

"And I love you,"  _I replied, bringing my hands to either side of his head and leaning down, pulling him into a passionate kiss for a long moment before reluctantly pulling away._

"I'll be back soon, I promise,"  _I finished, letting my hands drop from the sides of his face and I grabbed my General's hat, then went to the door and grabbed my rifle before stopping at the doorway._

"Oh, and try not to get a  _glowing_ Stag this time. Almost killed half of Tenpines when we served that up,"  _I joked with him and he smiled, nodding_ _to my words and I secured my hat on the top of my head before I took my leave._

_As I made my way down the hill towards the center of Cop-Op, I spotted Preston waiting for me under the sign like I had instructed and I made my way over to him. Each settler I passed wished me a 'good morning' and I couldn't disagree with them, the thought of what Danse and I did together playing over and over in my mind with vivid details that made me feel so alive. I hadn't felt like this in centuries.. It even made me contemplate going back to the house quickly so I could touch him or kiss him one last time, but I'd reward myself with such a thing when I finished my mission and earned that pleasureful luxury._

_When I reached Preston, he tipped his hat to me and smiled._

"General,"  _he addressed me formally,_ "Ready to head out?"  _He asked and I nodded._

"As ready as I'll ever be,"  _I replied, beginning our walk out of Co-Op towards the Red Rocket Truck Stop._

"You seem.. Different this morning,"  _Preston pointed out,_ "More lively and in a good mood."

 _I chuckled nervously,_ "Oh yeah?"

"Yup."

"Well, I had a pretty successful patrol.. I got a stag and Danse is going to clean it for me and serve it to the Co-Op,"  _I lied, hoping, yet knowing, Danse would get the stag and wouldn't let our lie go to waste.. Not to mention it was a good plan to do in general to keep the settlers happy._

"Impressive. Looks like the Co-Op will be eating good tonight, huh?"  _He asked and I agreed._

"They certainly will,"  _I replied confidently, taking one last look back towards my home at the north end where I knew Danse would be waiting for me upon my return._

**_Seen you soon, Soldier._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading<3 Happy New Year!


	3. Tremble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draic walks back home to the Co-Op and is met by an unexpected guest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hellllooooooo I'm back! haha sorry it took so long to update this, but I ran into a rut with writing, even when playing the game, too. I haven't played in a long time bc I feel like I ruined my save and what I was trying to do and got discouraged and didn't want to start over, so I just stopped and never went back lmaoo but I've been playing again, therefore have had the want/need to update this and continue it soooooo enjoy~
> 
> PS i havent reread what i wrote with the last chapter since it was so long ago lmao so if there are things that don't make COMPLETE sense or if there are things that just pop up out of nowhere that weren't there before.. just act like they were there all along lollll

_I missed him. There was no doubt about that. I wondered how the stag fared with the citizens and how Danse cooked it. Hopefully to their liking, compared to how I did it._

_Everyone was a little weird about him joining the community. They had no idea yet that he was a Synth, word hadn't traveled that far yet, but newcomers always worry the ones that have things to be worried about, and Danse was that newcomer. The citizens were worried about him and I knew that, but, I didn't have anyone else I trusted enough to put in command besides Danse. It's the first time that Garvey and I have been out without at least one of us staying behind, so I was also concerned about leaving the town in Danse's command without everyone being comfortable with him yet.. Still, they trusted me, and I trusted him.. More than anything.. Hopefully that would be enough for them to grow to love him as much as I did and give him a chance._

_Still, I was worried about how he was doing without me._

_I sat in front of a campfire, poking it gently in boredom with my head resting against my fist that was propped up on my arm on my knee. Garvey was out scouting the area to make sure no more raiders were close by, no last minute stranglers, while I sat alone on a broken down bench in front of a warm flame. The fire crackled when I poked it at the right spots, the burning wood collapsing on top of others as it fell from being unstable enough to stand alone any longer. I looked out ahead of me and the shops surrounding the no-longer-functioning gas pumps were closing up, people heading inside to take a deep slumber that they were now looking forward to since Garvey and I were here to protect them. The edge of my mouth twitched up into a smirk at the thought of so many people being happy just by our presence. I had taken a liking to taking care of other people ever since.. Well, ever since the Fallout.. I felt that I needed to take care of other people to make up for the people that I couldn't take care of before.. I didn't want to let anyone else down ever again._

_I continued to poke the fire a little, still on watch, but also bored. I glanced up towards the truck stop diner that was lonely and lifeless to see Dogmeat lazily coming out from one of the doorways without a door, his claws clicking on the tile just before he reached the dirt and dead grass between the diner and the fire I poked at. He stopped next to it and one of his ears flopped over as if he couldn't even keep it up himself any longer, his eyes batting open and closed slowly and I could tell he was tired._

"You did good today, boy," _I spoke softly and he whispered a gentle whine of appreciation,_ "Come here," _I tapped my leg, watching as he struggled against his tired bones telling him not to move to come over to me and he sat down next to me, his body then collapsing and his bottom jaw lying over my right boot. I smirked at how cute he was, still loyal to me after all these years and even through his lack of strength, he found the will to make it over to me so I could touch him and appreciate him. I scratched gently behind his floppy ear, then pet from his snout all the way down to his shoulder blades a few times before he then shut his eyes and tried to get some sleep.. I bet that's what Danse is doing now, or maybe trying to. He always worries about me. Another smirk slid across my lips at the thought of him and how he'd worry about me, even if I was only a few miles away like I was now. I glanced up at the stars that were so much easier to see now during the fallout than they ever were before it. They were so beautiful and I never truly appreciated them until everything happened. Out of all the stars that I could see with my own eyes at this very moment, the many, many thousands, maybe millions, I wished I was on one that was better than this world. Anything even slightly better than where we were now would be a true Godsend.. But, God was long dead by now.. And if he wasn't, this life was some kind of sick joke that he hasn't stopped laughing at yet._

_Dogmeat propped his head up out of nowhere and I looked down at him again, my hand still on his head, cupping one of his ears as he looked behind me with both ears now completely propped up and his nose twitching like crazy. Before I acknowledged what he had heard, I noticed a few drops of blood on the right ride of his face that I hadn't noticed before, taking a gentle grasp of his bottom jaw to point his face more towards me again so I could clean it off and he let me without a fuss. Raiders blood, no doubt.. However, the second I was done cleaning his face and let go of his jaw, he stood up and his eyes never broke from whatever he had made eye contact with._

"What is it?" _I asked, taking out Kellogg's pistol from my boot and holding it between my legs as I glanced over my shoulder towards where Dogmeat was looking. When he began growling, I cocked my gun, ready to fire at any moment and my heart raced a little when I noticed a figure approaching in the dark._

_But, when Dogmeat let his one ear flop down again, I also lowered my defensive behavior and when I saw Garvey approaching, I uncocked the gun and slipped it back into my boot._

"You scared the fuck outta me," _I said with a whispered chuckle following my words and Garvey smirked as he approached and took a seat on a different, busted up bench close to me and the fire._

"You never get scared," _he said with a smile,_  "I was just checking the perimeter," _he replied in a calming manner._

"Yeah, I know, but when Dogmeat reacted the way he did, I got worried. You'd think he'd know your smell by now."

"Yeah, well.. He's been with you a long, long time. Maybe he hasn't truly learned my scent yet.. You do go on missions quite a bit.. Or, maybe his nose is getting soft," _he teased._

"No way. He's still just as good as the day I found him," _I replied, petting his head as his tail wagged while he stared at Garvey._

"Well, how do you know how old he was when you found him? He could be an old dog, for all you know. Plus, German Sheppard's don't live as long as some other breeds. They get hip problems," _he replied simply, although I took it slightly offensively and felt the need to defend my loyal companion._

"You're a dog expert now?" _I teased back,_ "He hasn't seemed any different than the day I met him, and in these kinds of times, I do pay attention to that kind of thing.. He's fine. Maybe he was just confused a little because his eyes weren't showing him what his nose could smell."

"Yeah, you're probably right," _he answered, although his smirk left his lips as I watched the fire illuminating his face._

"What's the matter?" _I wondered, watching him fiddling with his hands and I knew something else was on his mind that didn't involve Dogmeat._

"I.. I don't really know how to talk about it," _he answered, his view going down to his restless hands and when I felt Dogmeat's jaw rest on my right boot again, I stopped petting him and leaned forward a little more, my elbows resting on my knees and my hands limp between my spread legs._

"I don't like when people say things that way. I think people should just come out and say it, no matter how they think it might sound.. That's the whole point of a conversation, right? Or, maybe rather, a debate? An argument? ..Are you expecting to make me angry?" _I said with a smile, and Garvey smirked to the side of his lip, but it left soon after it was shown,_ "If it wasn't something you'd think would bother me, you'd say it straight, wouldn't you?"

"..Yeah.. Yeah, I would.. I just.. I don't know how you'll feel about what I'm going to say next," _he replied with his eyes still not meeting mine, his view going to the fire, to Dogmeat, then back again to the flames. I swallowed hard, my Adam's apple bobbing in worry and I wondered if he knew that I was messing around with Danse just before he and I had come here together. I didn't care that we would be out in the open as lovers, but I didn't know how Danse felt about it, so I feared I'd have to fess up to it tonight, right here and now, to Garvey._

"It's about Danse," _he began and my heart started beating faster, starring at Garvey's eyes that he refused to let meet mine,_ "Have you.. Have you heard about what he is yet?" _I breathed a sigh of relief to his words, his eyes finally meeting mine and I nodded._

"Yes.. I'm the one that saved him from being executed by Elder Maxson.. That's why I brought him here.. To get away from the Brotherhood," _I replied and Garvey nodded in understanding,_ "It took some convincing, a lot of convincing, actually, but he let me take him away from the Brotherhood and keep him alive. I know he's a Synth, but that doesn't make a difference to me.. Danse believed he was human the whole time and had no idea he was- What he was.. I believed him.. Danse threatened to keep himself locked away for the rest of his days, but I couldn't let him do that.. Being alone underground.. No contact with the outside world.. No contact at all.. Just.. Alone.. I then convinced him to come back here with me.. I still want him to feel like he's a someone. Like he belongs somewhere. His love for the Brotherhood is still very much there, but, it made me feel bad that he felt the need to lock himself away, so I invited him to the Co-Op," _I explained, trying to avoid the conversation that Garvey still might think he needs to express, but I still didn't know if he knew we were together.._

"How'd you do that?"

"He thought he was useless ever since he found out the Brotherhood was exiling him, but I told him- No.. Reminded him of why he joined it in the first place. To help humanity. He couldn't help it by being locked away, so I told him that even if he wasn't with the Brotherhood, he could still help the people that were still alive by contributing. He could help with crops, guns, armor.. He's valuable.. He was worth being kept out of the underground and helping those around him, even if he couldn't do it under the Brotherhood's order. He eventually agreed after-" _I paused a moment, remembering that I had told him I loved him that same night, and even if he didn't feel helpful and still felt the need to stay underground to avoid the Brotherhood and being killed, he knew how much he meant to me, so he agreed to come with me._

"After, what?"

"Just.. A little more convincing," _I added._

"Well, I think we all know how good you are with your way of words," _Garvey replied with a chuckle and I smirked._

"Yeah.. My way with words," _I repeated back._

"But, if you invited him back to the Co-Op, why does he stay in your place? There's at least two beds open in one of the houses.. Why does he stay with you?" _He wondered next and I felt my cheeks and my ears starting to warm up._

"H-He, uhh.. He's just not used to the strangers there yet. I'm the only one he knows, besides you a little, and Dogmeat, so.. He felt the most comfortable with me, especially after how close we've become," _I tried to my best ability to not give away that I wanted him in my bed in the first place._

"But, you only have one bed?"

"..He sleeps on the couch," _I replied without hesitation and Garvey nodded, seemingly completely okay with my explanation of it all,_ "Plus, I have a lot of storage there and he can put his belongings, his remembrances, in his own containers, and not worry about others trying to take them and sell them or what-have-you.."

"Makes sense.. I'm sorry I brought the subject up, I just wanted to know the whole story so I could inform the citizens," _he replied and I looked to him quickly._

"You're going to tell them that he's a Synth?"

"Well, yes.. It's better to hear it from me than a trader or a stranger. They have a right to know, too," _he answered and although I was worried, I tried to act like I wasn't._

_"I.. I agree, but.. Don't you think that's a little extreme? You have no idea how any of them feel about Synths, and-"_

"-Relax.. I've been with these people longer than you have, and I don't mean that in a disrespectful way.. They know that you're busy and need to go out often.. But, I know which ones I can trust with the information and which ones I can't that I know will blab to others and cause some.. Unnecessary rage.. There's already a Synth that lives in the Co-Op that no one knows about but the ones that I trust, and she's been there for a long time," _my eyes widened to his words, surprised that I didn't know about her._

"Wait, really?"

"Yes, but don't be surprised.. Like I said, you haven't been around all that much, but with good reason.. It's not your fault for not knowing. My whole point is that if word comes around from anyone other than myself or you, I don't want anyone to be upset with us and think we were hiding something. It's not like they'll leave the village to find out the truth about one person that isn't involved with them directly, but, it's just for precaution.. The last thing we need right now is to lose the trust of a settlement," _he pointed out something that made complete sense, but I still couldn't help but worry.. If they did believe the rumors, which were of course, facts, they would more than likely want him to leave, and I don't know how I would respond to that. I had been with the Co-Op for a very long time, so I would miss it, but.. If I was accused of harboring a Synth among them and they didn't approve, I would leave. For everyone's sake. I just hoped that Garvey knew what he was doing. I trusted him, but I still couldn't help but worry._

"You're right.. I just can't help but worry that out of all of them, one might cause a complaint and convince the others.. After all, the girl you mention isn't a high rank within the Brotherhood. She isn't well known, or else I would've know about her before you even told me that.. Danse is.. Kind of a big deal.. He has military training and knows weapons well.. I don't want that to scare anyone that doesn't approve of Synths," _I pointed out and he nodded._

"True.. But, like I said, we've been with those people for a long, long time.. I know they would trust us more than a simple skeptic. There's nothing to worry about, Draic, trust me," _he assured me and I nodded with a smirk, but I still couldn't help the concern that refused to leave my thoughts. Should I prepare for the worst? Should I work on finding a new home for us, just in case? ..I probably should.. I should also inform Danse on what Garvey was going to do._

"I, uhm.. I think I'm actually going to head back," _I answered, Garvey looking at me as if I were insane._

"Wait- What? Alone? Why? I thought you were going to sleep here tonight.. Is it because of what I said?" _He asked in a quiet, panicked tone and I shook my head._

"No, not at all.. But, I told Danse that I would be home at the Co-Op tonight.. I shouldn't stay, he'll worry and probably think something happened to me and come looking for me and I can't let him do that and risk being seen.. I'm not tired, either, so I'll be fine. You know me," _I said with a smile, yet he still seemed worried as he watched me stand to my feet and Dogmeat lifted his head as well as his entire body quickly, ready to leave when I was._

"But, you can't.. I.. What about the Red Rocket?"

"They'll be fine.. And so will you. I'll have Dogmeat stay with you, too. He's tired now and I don't want to force him to walk with me. He'll be just fine after a little sleep and if you need any help with stragglers, he'll take out just as many as I would," _I confirmed confidently, bending down slightly and petting his head as he wagged his tail._

"Are you sure?" _He took a step closer, only a foot or two between us and I lost my smile momentarily as I looked into his eyes, but soon shook off what his eyes read and smiled again._

"Yeah, I'll be fine.. I should actually check on the Co-Op and make double sure Danse didn't get a rad-ridden Stag to feed the people.. Maybe I'll come back to everyone poisoned and it'll be a good thing that I came back home tonight instead of tomorrow morning," _I said with a chuckle, although Garvey looked uneasy by my comment._

"You shouldn't joke about that," _he discouraged and I chuckled nervously._

"I know, I know, I'm sorry.. But, I should get back, regardless, though.. Make sure everything is okay there," _I kept my smile as I looked at him, yet he gave me a look as if he was sad that I was leaving,_ "I'll, uh.. I'll see you in the morning when you get back, okay?" _I asked and he still seemed reluctant to me leaving, but he nodded as he glanced down at the fire._

"Yeah.. Yeah, no problem.. I'll see you tomorrow morning," _he replied, his view coming back up to meet mine and I noticed him glance at my lips for a split second, then back up to my eyes, but I ignored it and gave a final nod before shying my eyes away and stepping out and around the broken down bench I was sitting upon._

 _I heard Dogmeat's clicks and clacks of his long nails on the road behind me, but I stopped and instructed him accordingly,_ "No.. Go back to Garvey.. I'll see you tomorrow, too.. Go on, boy," _I pointed back towards the Red Rocket and he whined, stared at me for a moment, then turned around and went back towards Garvey by the fire. Garvey still hadn't stopped looking at me as I left, giving him one last smile and nod before finally turning around and beginning my long trek south back to the Co-Op._

______________________________________________________________________

_I walked for about two hours, like I knew I would. I thought of nothing but Danse as my feet led me back to where I was supposed to be as my eyes followed the stars. My neck hurt I had been looking up at them for so long, but I couldn't stop. All that I could think about was him and all I wanted to do was come home to him sleeping in bed and crawl into it with him after ridding myself of these heavy clothes. My legs hurt, my neck hurt, my arms hurt from the battle, but I kept going. He fueled me. Knowing I'd get to see him again is what fueled me._

_I heard some rustling up ahead of me, grabbing my gun from my boot and holding it tight within my grasp. A raider? A stag? A mole rat? My thoughts were now completely rid of Danse and went into survival mode. He clouded my mind and in order to get to him, I needed to forget about him and fend for myself so I could. I walked slower, silencing my steps as my eyes darted from the left and right until my ears finally honed in on where the noise was coming from. It was to my right towards the lake that was my map marker. The thing that I needed to get past and then I was home free.. The figure I saw that the moonlight helped me see, however, was not what I expected to see.. Not what I wanted to see.. Not this far north._

_A Deathclaw._

_My heart raced more than it ever had. I had had my encounters with them before, but none were the same and each were completely unpredictable. I stopped on the broken road, frozen for a moment as I listened to my heart beat and my nose inhale and exhale air. The night was so silent that I could hear the confidence draining from my veins. Deathclaws were always a hard, worthy opponent, but I wasn't as ready as I was for one now. I didn't have Danse. I didn't have Garvey. I didn't have Dogmeat. I didn't have my missile launcher. All I had was a pathetic pistol that would take me at least fifty or so shots to take it out and I didn't even have that kind of ammo. Maybe Garvey was right on me not walking home alone.._

_It drank from the lake I so desperately wished to pass. Only about a mile or so more and I'd be home, but that was a long, long way from where I was standing and what I was up against.. Or, at least, up against trying to pass without getting noticed.. It would surely notice me. No doubt about that. But, how long before it would? How long before it would notice me to where I could run and gain the aid of our turrets at the Co-Op to help me kill it? Could I run for it? Really, could I? ..I didn't know._

_I took a silent, slow deep breath in and held it, finding the strength for my feet to walk again and I held my breath as I took slow, silent steps towards the outside of the road, knowing that kicking or stepping on a rock would make it notice me. I went to the grass, the last green grass in the area that was soft and dewy and wouldn't cause any noise. I walked for about ten feet, then stopped, took a new breath, held it, then continued. I did this every ten feet. Every single ten feet.._ _Until.._

_*SNAP*_

_I cracked a fucking twig. I stepped on a tiny twig that had fallen from the tree I was under and the Deathclaw's head jerked up as if it didn't care about whiplash._

_I stopped dead in my tracks, my breath still being held and my gun in hand. I stood still, starring at the beast dead in the eyes from about one hundred feet away and wondering if it was waiting for me to move so it could hunt, or wondering if it even could see me. I could feel my heart ready to burst out of my chest. It continued to stare at me and I couldn't move, watching droplets of water that fell from its mouth that glistened in the moonlight fall to the ground and they were so blinding. So blinding, as I stared at my potential murderer. It's eyes were starring into my soul, but I still hadn't figured out yet if it could see me, or if it was waiting for me to run.._

**_Had it just chased something recently and was just fueling up for another hunt with the water it now drank? Did it want me to run? Could it even see me? ..I.. I can't tell.. I can't fucking tell.._ **

_It was just as still as I was. I was so close to being completely passed it that I could taste the rest of the road I needed to walk in order to get home safely, but I needed the entire one hundred percent assurance that I'd make it before moving.. Not eighty. Not ninety five. Not ninety nine.. One fucking hundred.. And I was just shy of it from where I stood._

_Little did I know, the knife hooked to the outside of my jacket had fallen loose after the battle I had at the Red Rocket and it was teetering on the edge of falling out of my pocket ever since. The second that it fell and didn't hit the soft, silent grass, but hit the stick I had stepped on, I bent down within a split second and picked it up, then ran._

_I knew the Deathclaw had heard it fall, so I didn't bother to waste that time checking to see if it did and not pick up an extra weapon. The second that my feet took to the road and ran, I was right, it followed straight after. I could feel the ground shaking behind me as its heavy footsteps clashed with the broken road after me. I took a split second to turn around and flip the knife within my hand into a throwing stance and pitched it, knowing that I had hit it in its left eye when I saw the moonlight cease from glistening upon it and within that still split second, I turned back around and continued to run as fast as I could. The roar it made when I hit its eye made my stomach turn in fear, but I didn't let it stop me from running as fast as I could. With my gun still in my other hand, I pointed it behind me and began firing it wildly over my shoulder in hopes of slowing it down, but it didn't seem to help, even despite the cries I continued to hear it let out when I hit it a handful of times._

_The next thing I knew, the footsteps were right behind me and I knew that its hand, claws and all, that was the size of my torso in length, swept my feet and I fell to the ground. I hit my chin and the right side of my face on the broken road, but that didn't stop me. Luckily, I still held onto my gun after the fall. I immediately went to my back and began firing at its face, causing it to back off and try to block my shots with its massive hands and claws and a few bullets even ricocheted off its claws back onto the road just slightly away from where I lie._

_I wasn't thinking about Danse for one moment as I tried to get around the creature, but now that I was face to face with it, literally, I cried out with a loud "Ahhhhh!" as I fired my gun rapidly._

_Danse was now all that I could think about. I didn't care if it took my legs, if it took my entire body and killed me slowly, but just so long as I returned the favor and got to see Danse one more time before my final breath, I'd be okay with dying. I'd be okay with it. I was close enough to the Co-Op for the citizens to hear my struggle and the sound of my voice.. I knew they'd come to my aid.. But, would Danse? Even if this thing mauled me and I had seconds left to live, would Danse be among the citizens that crowded around my dying body, telling me everything was going to be okay? ..Would he be there?_

_Selfishly, I wanted him to be.. For my sake.. But, did I really want him to see me like this? Dying in his arms? ..No.. I hoped he wouldn't be there to see the life leave my eyes.. I don't want him to be here. I didn't want him to see me like this._

**_Don't show up, Danse.. Don't show up.. Please, don't._ **

_As I heard the last of my clip exit the gun, feeling the Deathclaws blood from its face dripping down on my own face and my clothes, soaking through it almost instantly for how much it was bleeding, I heard cries of war from just up the road. Many cries. I watched then as the moonlight glistened on the face of the Deathclaw from the amount of blood on its face, able to make out exactly what it looked like, facial features and all, as it looked up towards the road to where the Co-Op was. The scales frightened me, the blood that still dripped from its eye down its large jaw down onto my chest, neck, then face the more it looked onward, I was in shock. I couldn't move. It placed one of its hands on my torso, the very sharp ends of its claws just barely gripping my collar bones and it felt like a piano was on my chest, but before I felt anything inside of me crack, it lifted its hand back up and was jerked back by bullets piercing its face and neck and chest. Many, many bullets._

_Its body jerked back every time it was hit by a bullet, which seemed like a hundred times a second, as if it was seizuring above me and when it finally was pushed back and fell away from me to die, its body shook the broken road I lie helpless on. I could barely breathe. I couldn't believe that my wildest dream had happened. They saved me. The citizens came to my rescue, but, was Danse one of them? I could still hear the creature struggling to attempt to breathe and survive, but a few more bullets shot through the air and the breathing then stopped. The beast was dead, but was I? Was this all a dream? Did it kill me already and this is what I wished had happened instead? I could hear many footsteps approaching me, some going right passed me to make sure the beast was truly dead, but some coming to my side and I then felt the warmth of a human's touch on my chest, my neck, my head, my shoulders, my legs.. My legs.. I couldn't feel them._

"General Draic, are you okay?!" _A woman asked and I blinked softly and slowly, losing consciousness._

"We need to get him back to the camp! There's a stimpack I keep under my bed! I'll use it on him!" _I heard a man cry out._

"I have plenty of stimpacks! Bring him to his house!" _I then heard a voice I could never forget.._

**_Danse._ **

"Bring him to his house and I'll fix his legs!" _I continued to hear, but it felt too good to be true.. This had to be a dream._

"Draic?! Draic! Can.. Can you hear me? Draic!" _I could still hear his beautiful voice._

**_My love.. He came for me.._ ** **_He was one among the people.. I could feel my body being raised up and they followed his orders. Did they already trust him? That's good.. If I die, they'll know who to trust.._ **

"D-Dan...se," _I spoke quietly as my arm limp, even though I was reaching for him, and immediately, I felt his touch. He clenched my hand just like I wanted._

"You'll be okay, you hear me? We're bringing you back.. -And then we'll.. -But why did you come back alone? Where the hell is Garvey?! I would've.. -If you needed me, you could've.. -Let's get you somewhere comfortable and.. -Can rest and we'll try our best with at fixing your-"

_His words were in and out of my ears. I couldn't hear anything he said to its full extent. There was too much commotion, there were too many times where I drifted in and out of consciousness to hear everything he said. But, oh, how badly I wished to hear it._

_Is this my punishment? Just before I start a new life, I must witness my loved one in pain? I could hear the pain in my wife's voice, symbolizing the end to my life. Now, I'm hearing it in Danse's, so is this the end of another?_

_Am I going to wake up from this, or will a new life for me start up new just for it to end again in tragedy?_

_What did I do to deserve any of this?_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhhh and as far as my knowledge, there is no synth in the Co-Op.. I just added that for story sake >_>>>
> 
> also forgive me for any grammatical errors


	4. Digress and Repress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draic wakes up after the accident to an interesting encounter with Garvey.
> 
> Later, Draic and Danse take things forward to the next level again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, so sorry for the long-awaited chapter update. I honestly thought I posted this chapter BACK IN APRIL??? But, I came back to AO3 to see that it was still a draft?? So here it is! I'm so sorry for not posting it sooner! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy! <33

**_Am I dead?_ **

**_. . ._ **

**_No.. I'm not._ **

_I_ _can feel someone holding my hand and a breeze coming in from a window to my right. The bed felt familiar and I could feel fur touching my right arm, as well as the weight of Dogmeat's head resting on my bare chest. I was in my house back at the Co-Op. Slowly, my eyes opened and the room was dim due to the boarded up windows, however, just the right amount of sunlight peaked through the cracks and I always loved the sight of particles of dust floating through the air in streams of sunlight. It had this calming way about it and I always felt at peace when I watched them, trying to count each on in the air before the next breeze came and took them away._

 _With my head propped up slightly on a pillow, I looked down at my chest to see Dogmeat sound asleep. I smirked softly at the sight of him and how, even in a situation like this, he loved being at my side and trying to give me the same comfort and care that I always showed him._ _My shirt was off and when I examined my chest under Dogmeat's head, I was surprised by what I noticed. Luckily, the Deathclaw didn't break anything, but it used enough forced on my chest that it left behind a red, rough looking hand print that irritated and bruised my skin. You could make out exactly where it touched my chest. I then looked past my loyal canine's head down to my legs, feeling that I wore a pair of briefs under a white blanket that was pulled to cover me from my hips to my thighs. From my knees down, my calves were bandaged up and little specs of blood were seeping through the bandages. They hurt, which was a good sign. At least I could feel them now compared to when I couldn't the second the beast swept me off my feet._

_My eyes then looked to who was holding my hand and I knew it would be Danse. His hand gripped mine as he sat in a chair next to the bed with his head resting on the mattress next to my thigh, sound asleep, just like Dogmeat. Somehow, although I never thought it to be possible, his face held both the expression of peace and concern as he slept._

_I slowly pulled my hand out of his grip and reached forward with it, letting my fingertips slide gently across his cheek until I cupped the side of his face within my hand. My thumb softly rubbed the stubble on his face and I wanted him to wake up calmly from my touch rather than shaking him or saying his name. When Danse began to stir a little in his sleep, I knew he was waking up. His hand that was holding mine before gripped and formed a fist, as if searching for my own and when he didn't feel it, his eyes opened in a hurry and he looked up to me as he lifted his head quickly. His eyes still sleepy and trying to gather what was going on before his mind finally caught up when he looked at me._

"Oh, thank goodness you're finally awake,"  _he said with a smile that made me feel ten times better, watching as he stood up hastily and brought his hands to either side of my face. He stared into my eyes for a long moment before leaning down and planting a passionate kiss upon my lips, holding them there for another long moment before pulling away and resting his forehead against mine._

"I'm so glad you're okay,"  _he said as he shut his eyes and I smiled as I shut mine, as well._

"Yeah.. I'm okay.. Thanks to you,"  _I replied, reaching up and holding his hands that held my face and basking in his touch for a few seconds, although after I had spoke, we were pulled away from one another when Dogmeat woke up to my voice and pushed his face between us, whimpering and feeling his tail wagging against my leg. Danse pulled away and I chuckled softly as I then gave my canine a much needed hug, his tongue licking my ear and my cheek and I shut my eyes as I laughed softly._

"Okay, okay! Stop! I know, I know," _I said to Dogmeat who's body was now wiggling around and shaking the bed from his excitement._

"Dogmeat, come on.. Get down," _Danse reasoned with him and he ignored him, but when I repeated the same words to him, he obeyed and jumped over me and off the bed. We watched as he then ran outside and heard his claws joyfully tapping against the deck outside the door, then calling out in high pitched barks what were mixed with a gentle whimper of excitement._

"Ahh, shit.. He's letting everyone know I'm awake," _I said with a sigh and a smile, looking up to Danse who had now turned his attention away from Dogmeat going a little crazy outside and was looking down at me with a concerned expression._

"What is it? What's wrong?" _I asked, but he didn't answer me. Instead, he bent over again and kissed me. As his lips massaged against mine, I could feel his weight meeting the bed and he sat down next to me to get comfortable and I knew then that this was going to be a long, much needed make out that I wouldn't dream of stopping. One of his hands came up to the side of my face and one of mine reached up to hold the nape of his neck to pull him into me more. As if we thought the same thing at the exact same time, our mouths opened and our tongues intertwined as I let out a soft, whispered moan as his other, unoccupied hand slid slowly down my chest. Did he really want to do this now? I wasn't opposed, but I knew that someone would be coming to my house soon thanks to Dogmeat's barks of happiness and I didn't want to start something we couldn't finish._

_And, just as I predicted, someone did come to my home._

_I could hear footsteps approaching from outside and the second we both heard a set of boots walking quickly up the stairs to the deck just outside my door, we pulled away from our kiss and Danse sat up straight on the bed as I tried to calm my slight panting and rosy cheeks. Preston lifted the flag that hung over my doorway and he stood there a moment without saying a word. I felt as if we had been caught, even though we stopped before he saw anything._

"Draic, I-" _Preston began, but stopped for a second to figure out what he wanted to say exactly, "I feel responsible for this," he said with remorse written all over his words and his face._

"Don't beat yourself up about this, Preston, it wasn't your fau-"

"You should feel responsible," _Danse then cut me off, standing from the bed and in between Preston and I,_ "Why weren't you with him? He could've been killed! You saw what happened to his legs when you got back with Dogmeat last night! This wouldn't have happened if you were with him!" _Danse spoke angrily._

"Danse, it's not his fault.. I told him to stay behind for the night and keep watch on the Red Rocket until morning. Don't blame him for this," _I instructed._

"I should've went with, you're right, Danse," _Preston agreed,_ "And I can't tell you how sorry I am for not doing that.. Next time, I'll-"

"-No.. There won't be a next time, Garvey," _Danse continued to lash out,_ "Next time, I'm going with him and you're staying here. You should've protected him-"

"-Danse!" _I stopped them from arguing,_ "I can take care of myself and everyone knows that. It's no one's fault but my own. Who knew a Deathclaw would be so close by? No one could've known that, so stop putting the blame on others when you should be mad at me," _I pointed out and the room fell silent for a moment._

"Can I have a word with Preston alone for a minute, please?"  _I more so told than requested and Danse looked at me as if he hated the idea of it, but he then stepped away from the bed and made his way to the door, knocking into Preston's shoulder with his own before exiting. I could tell by Danse's footsteps that he didn't go far, he simply left the house and went down the steps, though stayed close to the house near the deck._

_I sat up slowly, letting out a gentle exhale in pain when I pulled my body back and adjusted the pillow behind me so I could sit up straight and Preston stepped over to the bed, sitting down on the chair Danse had been sitting in before and he removed his hat, placing it into his lap._

"Look, Draic, I-"

"Don't, Preston.. If I hear you apologize I'm going to shoot you myself," _I said with a playful smirk and he nodded reluctantly,_ "It's no one's fault but my own. I told Danse yesterday that I would be home last night, and knowing him, if I didn't show up, he would've came looking for me, and we both know that it's a dangerous time for him to be out on the roads," _I pointed out and he nodded._

"I understand.. I still can't help but feel guilty for not insisting that I come with you. It was stupid of me to let you go alone and I should've came with," _he still insisted and I rolled my eyes._

"And, what? Have us both be lying in beds right now? It was my own stupid decision to do it alone, not yours, so don't beat yourself up about it, okay?"   _I asked and he nodded again, his eyes finally leaving his lap and coming up to meet mine._

"Well.. I'm glad that you're doing better," _he hesitated a moment, looking down at my hand and with a slow reach forward, he placed his hand on top of mine and my smile left my lips,_ "Really, I'm glad you're okay.. When a rider came and informed me of what had happened, I raced back here to check on you," _he continued and I then felt his thumb caressing the top of my hand. It made me uncomfortable knowing that Preston was gently coming on to me when Danse was right outside the door and I didn't know what to do. I had always had a feeling Preston liked me, but he had never done anything before like this to confirm it. I didn't want to hurt his feelings, but I didn't want him to be touching me like this._

"You left Red Rocket, even after me telling you to stay?"  _I spoke as a general, trying to make him know that he disobeyed my orders._

"Of course I did,"  _he quickly replied, not catching on that I was speaking in an impersonal way, but I still appreciated his actions._

"Thank you, Preston.. Really.. I appreciate it," _I replied, giving a brief smirk and to get him to stop holding my hand, I let out a slight groan in pain and pulled my hand away to reach forward and touch my leg._

"Are you all right?" _He asked in worry, looking down at my calves and not noticing that I had done it deliberately so he'd let go of my hand._

"Y-Yeah.. Yeah, I'm fine. It just hurts a little still," _I played off, but he didn't seem convinced._

"When was the last time you had another stimpack?" 

"I don't know.. I've been sleeping this whole time.."

"I'll give each leg another shot and change your bandages," _he insisted and I sighed softly as he stood up and went to one of the containers that he knew I kept my first aid items in._

"No, you really don't have to do that-"

"I won't take no for an answer. Besides, you're bleeding through these ones, it's time for them to be changed," _he continued and I sat there, still uncomfortable in his persistent presence, but there was nothing I could do about it now except hope that Danse would come back inside to check on me._

_Preston came back to the bed with two stimpack's and fresh bandages, taking a seat again in the chair next to the bed by my legs and beginning to undo the bandages. I winced a little as he took the bandages off and I watched how delicate he was trying to be with me. When one was completely removed, I looked at how they were bruised and busted up, a few gashes here and there from when the Deathclaw swiped my legs out from under me._

"Does it still hurt a lot?" _He wondered, glancing up to my eyes for a moment and I shook my head._

"No.. It's.. It's fine," _I answered, breaking eye contact with him and he then continued to take care of me._

"This will sting for just a second," _he warned me and I nodded, feeling the stimpack being stuck into my leg and the second I felt the liquid going into my veins, my leg already started to feel better. He then wrapped up my leg again and did the same procedure to the other leg._

"There.. All fixed up," _he said with a slight smirk, although I couldn't concentrate when I noticed he let one of his hands remain upon my knee._

"T-Thanks, Preston," _I replied wearily, not particularly liking where this had the possibility of heading,_ "I think I'm going to try to walk a little, my legs feel a lot better,"   _I continued and just from my words, I noticed Preston become flooded with worry and he removed his hand from my knee, standing to his feet as he watched me pull my legs up and swing them over and off the side of the bed._

"No, you really shouldn't.. Even if your legs are close to healing, you still lost a lot of blood, and they were broken no more than eight hours ago," _he panicked a little, holding his hands up to try to insist on me continuing to lie down, but I couldn't think of anything else to do to get him to stop touching me._

"I'm sure they're fine, and I need to put some pants on, anyways. I have a lot of things to take care of, too, so the quicker I can walk, the better," _I insisted, taking the white sheet from the bed with me and securing it around my hip with my left hand before slowly easing off the bed until my feet met the ground. It stung a little to put pressure onto my freshly broken legs, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be as I carefully stood up. Preston was watching my every move like a hawk and I chuckled softly as I stood there, my right hand holding the metal post at the foot of the bed as my left still held onto the white sheet to cover me from the waist down._

"Wipe that look off of your face. You're freaking me out, Garvey," _I spoke again, my right hand letting go of the bed post and quickly, I took hold of the wooden railing of the blue crib that belonged to my son that I refused to get rid of. I took slow steps over towards my suitcase that held some of my comfortable, civilian clothing, still holding onto the crib's railing as I walked, but when it suddenly cracked and caved in just slightly, I wasn't ready for the imbalance and stumbled. But, Preston was right there at my side to catch me from falling._

"So are you, to me, by trying to move around already," _he replied as he held me up from falling and I didn't like how intently he looked into my eyes and how his hand were holding onto my hips and how close his face had suddenly gotten,_ "Maybe you should learn to let people take care of you every now and then," _he added, still looking into my eyes and my heart started to race a little. I knew that look in his eyes, I've seen it a lot lately, and even more and more ever since Danse had moved to the Co-Op. I felt as if he knew something might happen between us, or maybe he already knew something was going on, and he wanted to make his move before anything between Danse and I got serious. Sadly, for him, things between Danse and I had begun so long ago._

_My throat bobbed as I swallowed hard._

_I was right._

_When Garvey then moved closer and leaned into me more, closing the gap between us, I pulled my head away and denied him what I knew he wanted,_ "Preston-" _I said quietly, seeing him stop from the corner of my eye and he seemed both confused and disappointed, as if he knew he had a fifty-fifty chance of this playing out like he wanted it to, but ultimately not getting the result he wanted._

"I'm.. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to- I-" _he stammered a bit to find the right words,_ "I just.. I just thought that there might be something between-"

"-No.. There isn't.. I'm.. I'm sorry," _I replied reluctantly, not wanting to hurt him, but I couldn't let anything he wanted to happen, happen._

"I see," _he answered, slowly and carefully pulling his hands away from touching me after I had found my balance,_ "Did I do something wrong?"

"No, no.. It's not you," _I assured him._

"Then there's someone else," _he assumed and I finally looked back to him and connected our eyes, watching him smirk in defeat and nod softly to himself,_ "Is it Danse?"  _He asked next and my eyes broke away from his, but before I could answer, he seemed to have already figured it out by my one second of silence,_ "It's all right, Draic.. I won't tell anyone," _he added, taking a few steps backwards and away from me and I looked back up to him, watching him then go to my bed, grab his hat and place it back on his head._

"I'm sorry, Preston.. I really am," _I said quietly, not really knowing what else to say at this point._

"Don't be.. Get better soon.. I'm sure I'll have more missions for you to go on once you're one hundred percent," _he said with a smile that I knew was fake before taking his leave and stepping out of my home. I sighed heavily as I leaned against a stack of trunks next to the crib, still holding onto the blanket around my waist with my left hand and my right hand came up to the bridge of my nose to rub it in hopes of getting rid of the headache of a situation I just had to put Preston through. He was a loyal friend, but that's all he was to me. A friend. A very, very good friend._

_I brought my hand away from my face when I heard different footsteps approaching the door and when I looked up, I saw Danse lifting the flag that draped over the doorway and when he looked to the unoccupied bed, I could see the split-second concern in his eyes right before he looked over to me standing between the crib and my suitcases full of clothing._

"Why are you standing? Are you insane?" _He asked in a frantic manner, hastily coming over to me and wrapping one of his arms around my lower back and helping me, or rather, forcing me, to get back into bed._

"I'm fine, I just wanted to put some pants on," _I said with a smirk, somewhat enjoying the seemingly constant worry he had for me as I then sat down on the bed. Danse took a moment to help me lie back down, being careful with my legs as he lifted them onto the bed with me and laid them out straight. I sat up against the propped up pillows and as much as I didn't want him to ask the things I knew he would, I didn't know what kind of expression I was making as I replayed what had just happened between Preston and I just moments ago._

" 'The hell did Garvey want? He looked upset when he left," _Danse pointed out, just as I wished he wouldn't, and he sat down next to me._

"He was."

"Why?"

"I let him down."

"Did he say that to you?" _Danse asked defensively with slight anger in his tone and I shook my head._

"No, of course not," _I replied with a brief chuckle._

"Then, how?"

"He.. He was just upset that I went off on my own, that's all. He just wishes- Wished, he could've done more to- For, me," _I stumbled a bit, but Danse didn't seem to look into it too much._

"Oh," _he replied simply and moved on,_ "Well, do you need anything? Can I get anything for you?" _He asked, his cute, puppy dog eyes coming back almost instantly and I smiled at just how much a simple look in his worried eyes made me love him more._

"No.. No, I'm perfect now," _I retorted, reaching up and touching his face for a moment before letting it drop back down to the bed again,_ "Hey.. Can I ask you something?"

"Of course," _he replied without hesitation._

"You were the one that took all my clothes off, right?" _I wondered and his cheeks flushed a soft pink,_ "Only you were in the room when that happened, correct?" _I wondered more and he nodded strongly._

"Yes.. Y-Yes, of course. No one else saw you, I made sure of it," _he replied and I could tell how embarrassed he was._

"Good.. Cause it was a little of a shock to wake up almost naked."

"I-I'm sorry.."

"Don't be.. Did you do anything to me while I was unconscious?" _I joked and he looked to me with his cheeks now completely red._

"No! Of course not," _he, of course, was telling the truth, but even if he did do something to me, I wouldn't have cared._

"I'm just teasing," _I said with a chuckle and he snickered softly with nerves written all over his voice and face,_ "Thank you for taking care of me, and for everything that you've done already,"  _ _I continued and I saw a slight smirk hit his lips.__

"If you think of anything else you'd like me to do, just name it, and I'll do it for you," _he encouraged and I couldn't help where my mind wandered. My eyes went down to his lips and slowly lower, taking in every ounce of muscle on his body that hid behind his clothes and eventually, my eyes found their way back to his._

"..Anything?" _I raised a curious, enticing brow and I saw the smirk leave his lips and he shied his eyes away for a moment,_ "I'm joking," _I added, although that was a complete lie. But, what made me more curious was how he didn't laugh or even chuckle slightly and I could see him pondering something._

"..You don't have to be," _he implied, his voice nervous and shaky and I could never get enough of this 'innocent' side of him he only showed to me._

"Oh? ..And just what did you have on your mind?" _I teased, bringing the same hand that touched his face moments ago down to his left thigh and I squeezed it gently._

"I told you already.. Whatever you want.. So, just tell me," _he added, his eyes still shying away from mine and I watched as he couldn't help but glance down at my hand that touched his leg, as if wishing it was a little higher and to the right._

"Okay," _I accepted the challenge, although I already knew what I wanted to do with him before I ever even said I was joking around with him._

_I carefully sat up straight, his face now inches from mine as I tested his words, seeing if he'd let my hand travel up his thigh ever so slowly and his reaction wasn't to turn me away. He didn't react negatively at all. I knew he was shy, nervous and a little reserved when it came to doing anything intimate, but his invite sparked something in me that didn't want any of this to stop like it had been stopped many times before. Was my near death experience scaring him? Like he'd never see me again? Like if we didn't do something intimate now, it never would happen?_

_**Don't get scared, Danse.** _

_I still had yet to touch or even see his cock and I could tell how much he was finally ready for me to when he didn't stop me, my snail-paced hand reaching for the erection I knew he had and when I found it, I took a gentle hold of it over his worn down jeans that were so giving, I could picture what it looked like perfectly in my mind. I watched as his eyes shut and his lips parted to take a quiet inhale through his mouth. I bit my bottom lip in a craving manner to his reaction, instantly making me as hard as he was and I then began gripping and massaging his erection over his pants. He was bigger than I expected and it only made me crave for him to finally have sex with me, but I knew that even if it was something I'd wanted right here and now, he wouldn't, but might let me anyways.. But, I didn't want it to happen like that. I was okay with us going slow because I knew it's what he wanted, so I tried to keep myself from thinking too much more ahead of what I knew was going to happen in this moment._

_I could feel his warm exhales against my lips, able to tell that he was expecting me to kiss him, but I kept our lips inches apart as a way of still teasing him and making him want it more._

"Is.. Is this what you wanted to do?" _He could hardly speak as I continued to stroke him._

"Yeah, but.. There's something else, too," _I added back in a whisper and his eyes opened slowly in curiosity,_ "I want you to take off your pants and lie down," _I added, seeing his expression turn more nervous than it was before,_ "I'll close my eyes," _I sacrificed. Although I didn't want to shut them, I knew it would make him more comfortable._

"W-What do you want to do?" 

"You'll see," _I teased again,_ "Please?" _I requested, gripping his cock and his eyes shut for a moment again at the pleasure I knew he felt. After a moment of pondering my invite, he finally nodded and I slowly let go of him, giving him the 'okay' to stand up and do what he needed to do while I waited. When he stood up from the bed, I scooted down more towards the end of the bed despite my legs giving me a little feedback of pain, but I pushed passed it and shut my eyes for him. The sound of his zipper coming undone and the jean fabric slipping down his legs made my heart race and I almost opened my eyes to take a quick peak, but I checked myself before I did and somehow managed to keep them closed. When I felt his weight coming back onto the bed and he sat in the spot where I just was, I still waited for him to give me the 'okay' back as I had done for him before turning around and doing whatever I wanted. There was a moment of silence and a bit of fidgeting on his end, but when he finally settled down, he acknowledged me._

"O-Okay," _he said quietly, as if his voice was almost too scared to say anything at all and I smirked at how cute he was being._

 _Slowly, I turned around, though I continued to keep my eyes shut,_ "Still want me not to look?"

"Don't," _he instructed quickly._

"All right, it's okay.. You can blindfold me if you want, if you want to make complete sure that I don't peak?" _I added in another teasing manner and long silence filled the room. His weight shifted in the bed and I heard him removing his shirt, then the warm fabric being rolled up and he placed it gently over my eyes._

"Aww, you don't trust me?" _I joked, waiting for him to finish tying the knot._

"N-No, it's not that-"

"-It's okay.. Relax.. There's other ways for me to see what I'm doing," _I said with a grin and I wished I could look at how red I knew his cheeks were right now. He finished tying the knot and when I was sure he had leaned back again, I crept forward, placing my hands on his bare knees and pushing his legs open slowly to spread them more. I then leaned down, resting my torso against the fabric of the mattress and even though I couldn't see a thing, I knew exactly where I was._

_I rested my elbows on the outside of both of his knees and brought my lips down to his right inner thigh, kissing it delicately and I could feel his legs trembling already. I kissed up his thigh, inch my inch until I could feel the heat from the skin of his erection close to my face, but I didn't go there yet. I teased him more and went to his left inner thigh and did the same thing, kissing slowly up and up until I could feel the heat again on my other cheek, then stopped._

"Are you okay?" _I asked against his thigh, kissing it once more as I waited for him to answer._

"Y-Yeah," _he whispered his shaky, exhaled answer and a twitch of a smirk met my lips. My hands then found the front of his thighs and I gently slid them up his legs, extending my arms as my hands slid higher over his hips and up to his waist that I then stopped at and gently grasped. I could hear his breathing getting hitched and heavier, his whole body trembling from within his core and I knew he was tense. I wished he would relax a little and enjoy what he had coming to him, but I could understand his anxiety about it all. So much of his behavior when it came to us being intimate told me that he had never been touched like this until he had met me, which made me think he was a virgin, but.._

_**Wait.. He IS a virgin.. He had to be..**  
_

_I thought it made this so much more better at the thought that that could be true.. And if it was true, I'd have so much more fun doing what I was about to.. I couldn't wait, really._

_I continued my kissing up his thigh and I soon felt his erection touching gently against my cheek. His skin was so, so, so soft.. As if it had never been touched before, like I had predicted, and I could barely contain myself. I wanted to completely engulf him into my mouth the second the skin of his soft cock touched my cheek, but I couldn't.. I need this to last.. However.._

_**He came so quickly the other night when I never even touched him.. Should I really be teasing him this much?**  
_

_And the answer was yes. Yes. I couldn't help it. His erection glided gently against my cheek as I continued to kiss up his leg to his pelvis, kissing the base of his cock that was very lightly surrounded by hair, but I didn't mind. I tilted my head sideways so my tongue could wrap around the lower base of him and I felt his entire body twitch when I finally touched him where I knew he wanted me to. My left hand unclasped his waist and slid back down towards his hips and then took a gentle hold of the base of him, gripping it tightly at first before letting go, but upon that grasp, his pelvis jerked forward unconsciously and my tongue naturally licked up his hard shaft as a result. He let out a hard breath as well as a gentle_ "ugh"  _from the pleasure he felt and I figured, fuck it, no more teasing.. I'm going to show him the night of his life._

_Still keeping a gentle hold at the base of him, I lifted my head and let my tongue escape past my lips, licking up his cock that my hand didn't cover until I reached his head and I suddenly scooted a little bit more forward so I could get a good angle to suck him from. I slowly took his head within my mouth and slipped my head down slowly again, reaching my pointer finger and thumb with my lips still wrapped around his base, but I knew I could do better. I removed my hand slowly and continued on, taking more and more of him into my mouth and when he felt the back of my throat and I felt the base of him with my lips, his hand went straight into my hair and gripped it with his left hand. I listened as he let out a soft cry of pleasure and his cock twitched inside of my mouth, as if he was almost already ready to come, but I wouldn't allow that so early on._

_I slowly removed my mouth from surrounding him and sucked on his head for a moment before finally pulling away and letting my left hand come back to holding his erection up for me._

"Did you like that?" _I asked, holding a smile on my lips as my hand then began to stroke him slowly,_ "Did that feel good?"

"Y-Yes.. More," _he answered with a shaky breath._

"More?"   _I questioned, and just by how his torso shook, I knew he had nodded extra hard to my question.. But, I wanted to hear it._

"I didn't hear anything," _I teased._

"Y-Yes.. Do it again.. More," _he pleaded and that's all that I needed to continue on._

_Without wasting any time, my hold on his hard cock was a perfect guide and I wasted no time again in my mouth finding his erection and taking it all into my mouth. His thighs twitched as I sucked softly on his head, then took him slowly, entirely, then did it all over again. And again. And again.. God, I wanted to see him and his expression so badly, but my eyes were blocked and all I saw was black. This wasn't fair. I wanted to look him in the eyes as my head continued to bob up and down and up and down and up again. All over again. I did it slowly, but still.. I wanted to see him. I wanted to look at his eyes and his flush cheeks and his body that I knew was shirtless thanks to the makeshift blindfold he gave me. I wanted to see him._

_I paused a moment, kissing the tip of him before speaking,_ "Can I please take this off?" _I asked desperately, my tongue then licking his head before continuing,_ "Please? Let me take this off.. I want to see you enjoying this," _I begged, my breath heavy and panting, going back to sucking softly and completely down his cock once again until-_

_Wait-_

_He was taking the blindfold off? I could feel it._

_I could feel his fingers trembling as he struggled to untie my blindfold and when it finally was released from my face, I opened my eyes instantly and watched him toss his own shirt aside. It was still light out, the sun still peaking through the breaks in the boards I had put up on the windows and.. Fuck.. He was so, so gorgeous._

_Fuck.._

_His body.. His abs.. His chest.. Him throwing the blindfold.. His cock in my mouth.. His cheeks red.. His panting.._

**_Holy fuck._ **

_My left hand still clasping his erection and my head still bobbing up and down upon him, I took my right hand away from his waist finally and brought it immediately down to my own erection, beginning to touch myself as I continued to hold him in place with my left and suck him off as best as I could. My eyes looked up to him as I did this and his face was so flustered that I could barely function, his lips parted softly, yet breathing heavily.. Panting.. His eyes shut as he laid his head back, or maybe he was just losing the ability to keep his neck strong? Because a second later, he bobbed his head back forward and continued that sexy look in his eyes that read to me 'I can barely take this'._

"F-Fuck, Drai.. I.. I can't,"  _he threatened to come already, but I wasn't even close to being done with hit yet._

 _I pulled myself away from his cock and spoke,_ "Slow down.. It's okay.. Touch me," _I begged to give him something else to do before be came so soon, arching my back and I could feel the white sheets that still covered me from my waist down beginning to fall past my hips and the rim of the sheet stopped falling halfway down my ass._

"W-What?" _He seemed confused and scared._

"Suck your finger and touch me," _I added, moving my hips a minuscule amount, grinding myself against the bed, but it was enough to get the white sheet to slide down the rest of the way past my ass and stop at the bottom crease and I knew just by observing his expression that he knew what I wanted._

"B-But.. Are you sure?" _He asked and I answered him instantly._

"Please," _I begged._

_The next thing I knew, I watched him soak his index finger in his mouth and I moved my entire body upward so my lips were straight over his cock and my ass propped up just enough for him to reach against his knee. I put my mouth back over his cock and the moment I felt him hit the back of my throat again, I felt his slick finger slowly sliding down over my tailbone and towards my ass. I started to suck him a little quicker, but not harder. I didn't want him to come until he experienced what I wanted him to do to me and the second he hesitantly inserted his index finger into me, my whole body relaxed and I couldn't even describe how turned on I was now. I continued to jerk myself off slowly as I sucked on him and once he realized I was okay with him touching me like he was, I felt him finally gain some confidence and he slowly went in and out of me repetitively. Fuck, it felt so good. My breathing went heavy and I sucked him harder, up and down and up and down again and again and harder and harder. God, I loved this. The more I showed his cock that I loved it with my mouth, the more he showed me he loved fingering me as he then went a little faster and even cupped my ass with his other fingers.. But then.. He switched. His middle finger then stuck into me as his index, ring and pinky finger held my ass, held me open, as his middle went in and out in a perfect, consistent pace and I was almost dying now.. Was I sure that he'd never done this before? Because, what he was doing was damn near perfect.. The fact that he could catch on to knowing how I liked to be fingered so quickly blew my mind and as I still sucked him and jerked myself off, I feared that I would be the first to come in **this** instance._

_I took a second to let him know how he was doing by removing my mouth from his cock._

_"F-Fuck, Danse.. Keep going.. F-Fuck," I begged with a sense of urgency and then went straight back to sucking him as well as my hand jerking him and myself as best as I could. I needed to keep up. What the hell was this? Whenever we did something sexual, especially something new, he'd always be the first to come, but, holy shit.._

_**I'm going to cum..**  
_

"Harder!" _I begged quickly and he did just that as I sucked and stroked him as hard as I could, as well as my own cock, and the second I felt him come in my mouth, I came all over his calf and the bed, convulsing just as he was into my mouth and he even went deeper into me with his finger to get me to come harder.._

_By the time he was done, I was still coming for a few more seconds until my body finally gave up and I was done.._

_I swallowed everything he had given to me._

**_Holy shit.._ **

_I could feel his body lean over and his chest was against my back as we both collapsed. We both sat there for a moment in total amazement._

"H-How do I-?"

"Slowly.." _I replied, feeling his chin nod to me against my back and he slowly lifted himself up, then slowly, ever so slowly, pulled his finger out from my ass and the second it was out, my body completely collapsed onto him. My head rested inbetween his left thigh and his now-soft cock, but I didn't care. All that I could focus on was how he had felt during that and also my breathing.. I was so out of breath._

"H-How.. How was that?" _I struggled through my panting and it took a long, long moment to get an answer.._

"Exhilarating," _he answered and I couldn't help but smile and chuckle slightly at how that was his answer for the first time fingering me and letting me help him cum with my mouth._

"I agree," _I added with the last of my heavy exhales, finally gaining control of my breathing after a few minutes and I finally sat up. I looked down at his now soft cock, but it still got me slightly hard again just looking at it._

"You done?" _I asked, holding myself up with extended arms on either sides of his hips and I watched as he pulled himself back and lie against my propped up pillows._

"Y-Yeah.. I'm.. I'm done," _he answered bashfully and his response only made me slightly harder, even._

"You really need to stop being this damn cute," _I said with an added chuckle._

"What? Why?" _He wondered and I laughed softly again._

"Because.. I'm hard again, and literally just because of your cute laugh," _I admitted and he smiled as he shied his eyes away from me and pulled his knees to his chest, trying to cover himself up._

"I have one more request of you," _I spoke again, seeing as though he tried to hide himself away from me, his eyes met mine and I knew he was waiting for me to continue,_ "Sleep here.. Sleep in my bed with me, like you usually do, but.. Hold me," _I pleaded._

"..Draic, I do every night," _he admitted with his cheeks blushing pink again,_ "You know I will," _he agreed and a wide smile met my lips that I was embarrassed at how big it was._

"Good," _I replied, then pulled myself up towards him, over his leg and lying right next to him so our faces were at the same point upon my pillow,_ "I don't want you to ever leave my side.. I want you always," _I added, taking my right hand and bringing it up to his face to touch and caress it as his left arm wrapped around me and pulled me close,_ "I love you so much.. So, so much," _I added and I could tell how much he melted within my arms to my words just by how his arm gripped me tighter._

"..I love you, too.. More than anything."


	5. Things Left Unsaid : Part 1 of 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danse goes missing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I'm really slow at updating this story, but you know, life and junk gets in the way. I'm back though with another chapter! I had to split it into two chapters because if I didn't, it was going to be most likely more than 25k words lmaoo enjoy! :)
> 
> http://rinntarouu.tumblr.com/tagged/youtalkinyoursleep

_It had been about two weeks since my accident with the Deathclaw. Despite some of my settlements needing me, Danse has refused to let me step foot outside of the Co-Op until I was fully rested and didn't have a limp anymore. Even with stimpacks and other medicine that made me feel much better than he'd believe, he still made me take it easy and kept me from doing anything crazy. I appreciated how much he cared for my well being, I found it quite adorable, but at the same time, I knew some of my settlements were in trouble and I hated knowing that I couldn't help. Preston has been nice enough to go to the settlements for me and take care of them, but he can only do so much. If I'm supposed to be the 'leader' that everyone thinks and hopes that I am, I need to make appearances to the settlements that have chosen to follow me. If I don't, I'd hate for them to lose faith in me if it seemed as if I didn't care.. Granted, Preston has told all of them that I'm on bed rest and how a Deathclaw swatted me like an annoying fly, but, still.. I wanted some fresh air outside of the Co-Op and I wanted to see more familiar faces besides the ones that lived in the houses around me._

_When I woke up this morning, rays of the sun shining through the spaces in the window that a wooden board didn't patch, I sighed longingly as I stared up into the rays. I counted the particles of dust that were big enough to see floating through the air, watching them dance in the barely-there breeze and I knew it was going to be a beautiful, calm day. I looked to my left, seeing that I was alone in bed and I figured Danse was off somewhere within the Co-Op annoying everyone with orders or instructing the naturally green-thumbs how to better grow their crops because a few of his stalks of corn were doing okay.. I smirked at the thought of how he thought he knew better than everyone.. He only did it to feel important and to help, seeing as people still weren't too used to his presence here just yet, but, he'd fit in soon enough._

_I lifted my head and saw Dogmeat's long body lying in between my legs, his jaw resting over my hip and his right front leg draped over my left thigh lazily. Not a care in the world, other than his need to be close to me.. I wished that Danse was in his spot right now._

_When I shifted my body a little, Dogmeat's head lifted and his ears perked up, happy to see I was finally awake and his heavy tail wagged back and forth._

"Hey, boy,"  _I said softly, sitting up and resting on my left elbow as my right hand stretched out to pet the top of his head and softly scratch behind his left ear,_ "Where's Danse? Huh? Where'd he go?"  _I teased, watching as his head swirled around the room, knowing who I was asking for and he whimpered before barking softly. He quickly stood up, one of his paws stepping on my cock and I let out a strongly discomforted noise and grabbed it to ease the soft pain as I watched him hop out of bed and race out of the house._

"Asshole,"  _I spoke in a slightly cracked voice with a grin on my lips and I swung my discolored white bed sheet off of myself. Shirtless and only wearing a pair of dark underwear, my usual bedtime garb, I sat up and hung my legs off of the side of the bed as I rubbed my eyes in an attempt to wake myself up more, even though the paw to my nuts really helped wake me up a hellova lot._

_I sat on my bed for roughly five minutes before standing to my feet and not feeling a thing wrong with my legs. I haven't been feeling anything wrong with them for the past few days, but Danse has still insisted I take a few more days to make complete sure. I stepped over to my suitcase near the doorway and pulled out a pair of 'seen-better-days' jeans and slipped them up my legs, zipping and buttoning them up before then finding a white tee. I held it up to my nose, taking a gentle whiff of it and deciding that it had at least a few more days wear in it before I'd need to wash it. I slipped it over my head and put my arms through and when I straightened it out a bit, I heard Dogmeat's claws clacking on the deck before he raced inside the house._

"Did you find him? Huh, boy?"  _I asked and he whimpered again, then let out a high-pitched failure bark and whimpered again,_ "No..?"  _I asked and quickly grew concerned. Danse knew better than to leave the Co-Op this soon after being banished from the Brotherhood and Dogmeat was always successful at locating him in the morning.. Which meant that Danse really was gone. Fuck._

_I hastily grabbed my leather jacket and threw it on, slipped on my boots and tied them as quick as I could, then headed out the door as Dogmeat led. I hurried off my deck down the steps and made my way down towards the center of the Co-Op, all while turning my head left, right and looking behind me to see if I could spot him in a place that maybe Dogmeat forgot to run past. When I noticed Piper leaning up against the barn, reading one of the many books she collected, I made my way over to her and she looked up to me with a perplexed face._

"You look worried. How are your legs?"  _She asked, her eyes then going back to her book and I ignored her question._

"Where's Danse? Have you seen him?"  _I tried to seem less nervous than I was._

"Uhm.. Hmm. I might've earlier? I think..?"

"How much earlier? What time is it?"  _I continued to pressure._

"Jeez, calm down, spaz. It's a little after eleven, I believe.. And I think I saw him leave and head North or something pretty late last night.. Maybe an hour or so after you went to bed,"  _she replied and my worry only intensified._

"Why would he leave?"  _I wondered and she shrugged._

"I dunno.. Go find him and ask,"  _she replied simply and I sighed._

 _I stepped up closer to her, making our conversation quieter and her eyes peered up from her book,_ "Look, you're the only one, besides Preston, that knows about Danse and I,"  _she was my best friend, after all,_ "I need to find him and you know why.. He can't be found by the Brotherhood, they'll kill him without mercy.. Please, help me find him,"  _I nearly begged and Piper could see the concern riddled all over my face. Suddenly, a 'clap' came from her book when she closed it._

"Fine.. But, we're not going anywhere without being prepared. Do you even have a gun on you?"  _She asked and I checked myself over, completely forgetting everything but the clothes I was wearing._

"No.. Let's go back to the house and I'll grab a few things, then we're heading out,"  _I retorted, turning around quickly to head back to my house._

"Sounds like a plan,"  _she muttered behind me as she followed. Today was beautiful, I was right about that, but as far as it being calm? Not so much._

_\- - - - -_

_After I loaded my 10mm pistol and my Lucky Gauss Rifle, then finding more bullets to bring along with me, Piper polished her own pistol as she sat on my bed._

"You're going to change into your Minuteman uniform, right? You can't go out looking like that. No one will take you seriously,"  _she commented on my leather jacket and jeans and I looked down at my attire momentarily._

"I don't have time for that.. It takes forever to put all that shit on,"  _I brushed off._

"Well, you really should. With you being the leader an' all, you really need to look the part.. **Especially** out there in the Wasteland.. And if we're going to be coming across some of your settlements before we locate Danse, you should **really** look the part after being unable to travel to them for the last few weeks,"  _she had a good point, I guess._

"I didn't ask for any of this.."

"Yeah, well.. You **are** it now, so.. Gear up, General,"  _she said with a teasing smirk and I chuckled._

"Don't call me that,"  _I replied, removing my jacket and beginning the rigorous task of putting on my entire uniform._

_Once placing my Minuteman hat on top of my head to complete the outfit, I slipped my pistol into my right boot and threw my Gauss over my shoulder and Piper, Dogmeat and I headed out._

_Piper enjoyed talking whenever we traveled together, but I wasn't in the mood and she could tell, so she kept her words to herself for the majority of the way so far. We_ _had been walking for about two hours North and we were following Dogmeat the entire way. He knew I was still looking for Danse and he was more than familiar with his scent, his nose to the ground every step of the way, but for how long we've walked, my worry had never left me. The farther we walked, the worse my nerves got. I hated that my mind dragged me into the deep corners of it that I hated to venture to.. One thought in particular disturbed me beyond belief and I was scared that once Dogmeat would catch a stronger scent of him, he'd lead me to his body lying on the road unconscious, or worse.. But, no, I couldn't think like that. I knew Danse and there was no way he'd let himself be taken out so easily by a raider, let alone anyone else._

"So, can we please talk about what's going on?"  _Piper finally broke the long, long silence._

"I'd rather not, but knowing you, you won't let me.. I'm just worried, that's all. He knows he's not supposed to leave the Co-Op, not at least until the heat dies down a bit more about him being banned from the Brotherhood. If he won't let me stop being on bed rest, then he shouldn't be going out and risk getting caught by them. Elder Maxson showed mercy once, he made it very clear that it wasn't going to happen again,"  _I said with a troubled, quiet tone._

"I see.. Makes sense. Kind of hypocritical of him, I suppose, keeping you in while he sneaks out,"  _she replied and I nodded._

"Yeah, exactly, and it makes me wonder why he's doing it.. Wait.. Has he done this before? Or was this the first time?"  _I asked and Piper hesitated a moment._

"I-I dunno.. He might've done it before, I don't know for sure, though. It's not like I keep tabs on the guy like everyone else in the Co-Op does,"  _she answered, but something told me she wasn't telling me everything. For now, I chose it ignore it._

"Okay.. Still doesn't answer why he'd be going North, though. What's North besides a few of the settlements?"

"Beats me,"  _she answered with a shrug._

"Sometimes he goes out and looks for stags to make dinner with for the Co-Op, but he wouldn't be gone for this long.. I just can't help but think the worst, you know? What if he's seen? What if he's shot at? There's so many things I feel like we haven't done together yet, or worse, things that maybe I haven't said to him yet that I want him to hear.. Even though I might not even know what those things are,"  _I continued to babble, trying to figure out what all of this was for and why he would go off alone and Piper stopped walking. I continued walking for a few steps before stopping and looking back at her._

"..What?"

"It's cute,"  _she said with a smirk and I raised my brow,_ "How much you care for one another.. I haven't seen love like this in the Wasteland in.. Well.. Forever, really.. It's nice to see,"  _she continued and I scoffed._

"Shut up."

"I'm serious. Every person I come across that's been in love is either widowed, has gotten their wife stolen from them or their husband went off and never returned, or I dunno.. Worse, somehow.. But, you and Danse? It's different. You two are strong and so is your love, as corny as that sounds,"  _she finished and I chuckled, my cheeks starting to feel a bit warm from blushing._

"Definitely corny,"  _I answered with a grin._

_The mood was quickly changed when suddenly Dogmeat stopped walking and a growl hummed in his throat, knowing full well that he would never growl at the man I loved and immediately within a split second, I pulled the pistol from my boot, whipped around and pointed it in the direction his nose was pointing. Piper did the same, hearing her cock her pistol behind me and aim. Dogmeat's nose pointed to a silver, abandoned, run down bus with orange stripes that I had seen once before along this path. It was just Southeast of Abernathy Farm. Cautiously, I approached the bus, but stopped when I saw the top of a head poke out slowly from one of the blown out windows._

"Hands up!"  _I called out,_ "Don't do anything stupid and come out of the bus,"  _I commanded, Dogmeat continuing to growl and he let out a warning bark. I noticed one hand rise up slowly, but not both._

"I said both hands!"  _I called out again, watching as the hand stayed up, but I still didn't see the other._

"I-I.. I can't!"  _A woman's voice called back, her voice shaking and scared and timid._

"Piper, keep the gun on her, I'm checking it out.."

"Careful.. Danse would hate if you found him and he saw that you were shot,"  _she teased._

"Shh!"  _I stressed and I heard her snicker softly as I approached the bus slowly._

"I'm putting my gun away, see?"  _I called out, putting the pistol back into my boot,_ "But, my friend still has one on you and she's a great shot, so don't try anything stupid, okay?"  _I warned, seeing the top of the woman's head and I assumed she nodded by how she moved it._

"O-Okay,"  _she replied and I could tell that she was still scared out of her whits._

"Keep that hand up,"  _I instructed, Dogmeat's ears back as he walked alongside me and I put my hand out flat, instructing him to stay and he stopped in the grass at the bottom of the stairs that led up and into the bus._

_Cautiously, I stepped up the stairs and once I saw the woman, her one hand still raised, she was crouched in the corner of the bus. Her hair was matted, her face covered in dirt. She wore long, torn up clothes, her feet looked like they had been through hell, and when I looked to her other arm that was obviously occupied by something, I nodded my head towards whatever she was holding that was being shielded by her clothing._

"You don't have a gun hiding in there, do you?"  _I asked, standing at the top of the stairs in the bus and looking down at the feeble woman that looked in her late twenties, but the condition she was in made her look in her forties. She shook her head quickly, still shaking and scared and I put out my hand, taking her word for it and I took a step closer._

"Don't worry, I won't hurt you.. What do you have there? I can't trust you if you don't trust me, too,"  _I offered and she looked down, slowly removing the clothes that blocked whatever she was holding and my eyes widened for a split moment._

_A baby. A baby no older that six months was cradled in her arm looking almost as dirty as she was. Instantly, my heart lifted and I smirked._

"It's all right,"  _I stepped closer, removing my hat and holding it as I bent my knee down to her level about ten feet from her,_ "Where did you come from?"  _I spoke in a calm tone, not wanting to scare her more than she already visibly was, but she covered her baby again and cowered when Piper stepped into the bus behind me. I looked back and saw that she still had her gun drawn._

"Hey! Hey, put the gun down, she has a kid,"  _I spoke quickly and Piper hastily put her pistol down._

 _I looked back to the woman,_ "It's okay, we're not going to hurt you.. Where did you come from?"  _I asked again and the woman soon looked back to me, her matted hair covering most of her face._

"..W-West.."  _She spoke softly._

"..West? But, it's.. It's all radiation that way, I thought?"

"..M-Most of it, yes.. But.. There's a path, if you follow it precisely.."

"What's your name, sweetheart?"  _Piper asked, but the woman didn't answer,_ "Do you know who the Minutemen are?"  _She asked next and the woman nodded._

"You do?"  _I asked, perplexed as to how she could have._

"My family, my boyfriend.. I've lost them all on the journey East.. We heard word that there was a group of people that had set up settlements, healthy ones, without radiation and ones that weren't surrounded by the monsters with horns,"  _she described in little detail, but it didn't take much to know exactly what she was talking about._

"Deathclaws,"  _I spoke under my breath._

"Well, today's your lucky day, honey. You're lookin' at the General of the Minuteman,"  _Piper said as if I was some kind of God and I rolled my eyes as I looked back at her, seeing her give me a quick grin and I looked back to the woman to see her eyes lit up and they were a bright shade of green, although the whites of her eyes were red and had a slight glow to them._

"We need to get her to Sanctuary, it's the only place I know of that has the amount of Rad-Away she needs to get rid of it all from her system,"  _I instructed towards Piper and she stepped closer and passed me, kneeling down by the woman._

"Come with us, we'll get you and your baby help,"  _she cooed sweetly, coaxing the woman to join us, but it seemed as if the moment Piper had mentioned that I was the General of the exact group she had been searching for, the woman seemed at complete ease around us and trusted us without question._

_As happy as I was knowing that Piper and I had found someone that needed help and were more than willing and able to give it, for a moment, it made me forget about why we were on the road together in the first place. I gave Piper my Gauss to strap on her back as I carried the woman on mine since she could barely walk, and Piper carried the woman's baby for her. The baby cooed as I watched Piper playing with the little one, dangling her finger over the baby's face and it smiling, eventually able to grab her finger and holding it tight._

"Strong grip, a good sign,"  _Piper said in relief._

_I smiled watching them, remembering what my own infant son felt like in my arms as if it were just yesterday. But, there was no use thinking about that now. I'd have the luxury of remembering those times when I completed my current mission, and that was finding the man that I loved that was now missing._


	6. Things Left Unsaid : Part 2 of 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draic continues his search for Danse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said in the last chapter that I had to split it into two parts because it was going to be so long, butttttt, I had to do it again for this chapter and split it up because I went overboard and it was 47k+ words long lmaooo sooooo this is part two of THREE now XD enjoy!
> 
> Also.. Some pictures to accompany this chapter~  
> http://rinntarouu.tumblr.com/tagged/youtalkinyoursleep

_The woman and baby Piper and I had found were still with us, the mother on my back as I carried her and the baby safe in Piper's arms. The woman was asleep, no doubt exhausted from whatever kind of terrifying and tiring trip she had to make to find her way to the Commonwealth and I couldn't blame her. Who knows what she had to go through to get to where she was now. We knew nothing about her, not even her name, but getting her help was the most important thing and we were close to Abernathy Farm. We needed to rest our legs just as much as the unknown woman did and it was the best place to rest our bones for a few hours before continuing on to Sanctuary._

_Piper and I cut across a field to approach the entrance of the farm, seeing Blake Abernathy at his post like he always was and Dogmeat ran up ahead with his ears perked up and happy to visit a settlement he enjoyed so much.. He only enjoyed it because everyone adored him and pet him like mad, especially the children who loved playing with him._

"General Draic, glad to see you up and on your feet again!"  _He called out from his post and I hoped that a wide smile I gave was acknowledgment enough to his greeting since we were still too far off to have a proper conversation with him._

_Upon approaching, he climbed down from his post._

"Good to see you, as well, and that your farm is still standing strong. Preston's been keeping a good eye on this place, I hope,"  _I sounded too much like a boss or something running a damn company as if I were away on vacation, but of course, he didn't take it that way. He knew I meant well._

"He has indeed, yes. How are the legs? Givin' yah any trouble, then?"  _He asked as he glanced down at my legs._

"Not anymore, no."

"Well, thank the Common Gods. Deathclaws can sure be one hellova bastard, aye?"  _He joked and I chuckled._

"Yeah, and then some,"  _I returned the humor and he smiled, nodding towards Piper and she greeted him, as well._

"And who have we here? The lass on your back seems to be near dead, if I do say so,"  _he showed concern and I looked over my shoulder a little to see her head still resting on my shoulder blade, still asleep._

"Luckily not.. Found her in the bus just down the road. Shaking, tired, feet beaten to all hell from how far she's walked. Brought a baby along with her, too. I was hoping we could rest here for a few hours before continuing on?"  _I asked and he smiled warmly._

"Of course, I was going to insist, regardless. Come now, I believe we can find something for you all to eat from the lunch we had earlier and a bed for the lass and baby to rest in,"  _he offered kindly and I smiled._

"Much appreciated, old friend,"  _I replied, following him up to the farm and he instructed someone else to watch the entrance while he attended to us._

_Blake showed us to a secluded corner of the farmhouse, giving the woman and her baby privacy from prying eyes. Piper brought over a haystack closer to the bed, pressing in the middle of it a little and creating a slight divot within it and found a few comfortable blankets to put over it. A do-it-yourself crib for what the wasteland offered and it worked perfectly. She wrapped the baby in one of the clean blankets, then set her down within the makeshift crib, watching as the baby cuddled into the grooves with ease and continued to shut her eyes and slumber. Next, Piper helped me get the unknown woman off of my back, helping her to an unoccupied bed and she laid down and was out again like a light._

"I'm gunna find some grub.. You want anything?"  _Piper asked and I shook my head._

"No.. No appetite. You go ahead, I'll stay here,"  _I answered with a soft smile, seeing her give one back with a nod and she walked away._

_I pulled up a chair next to the haystack that was placed in between the bed and I, looking down at the little girl sleeping. It made me miss Shaun, my son. His tiny hands and feet, his jet black hair and his crystal blue eyes, just like me.. I missed him. I missed him more than an anything, even Danse. My journey so far has sent me through such thick and little thin that I had no time to really go back to my memories of him, but looking down at this little baby girl now with nothing to occupy my my wandering thoughts reminded me of it all. I thought back on simpler times when his mother would sing him to sleep, our favorite song,["Crazy He Calls Me"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_mitLcbHHz8) by Billie Holiday. My wife's voice was so pure, innocent, calm, sweet.. I can still hear her singing it to Shaun in my mind.. There was a sudden pit in my stomach and my view went down to my lap where I watched my fingers fiddling with each other, not really knowing what to do with myself. Usually with downtime like this, I'd be with Danse or talking with at least someone about something, but being silent like this, having no one to distract me from my thoughts, I felt empty and I hated it. _

_I decided to ignore it, sinking down in my chair a little, tipping my Minuteman hat down over my eyes and crossing my arms, deciding to take a quick nap to keep my mind from wandering anymore than I wanted it to._

_Suddenly, maybe half an hour later, my eyes opened and I sat up straight, bringing my right hand to my hat and putting it back in place on the top of my head when I heard the baby cooing and beginning to cry softly. I looked over to her mother, still completely out cold and I then looked down to the little girl, watching her hands ball into fists and her eyebrow crinkle, shutting her eyes tightly and her mouth open the slightest bit to let out the first signs of a crying fit.. Something I was so familiar with seeing from Shaun. I removed my sash, my hat and blue cloak of a jacket, a comfortable short sleeve shirt underneath my Minuteman garb and I leaned over, putting my right hand under her head and my left under her body, picking her up and bringing her gently to my shoulder so her head could rest comfortably upon it without my jacket and sash getting in the way. My left arm supported her tiny bottom and I ever so gently rubbed her back with my right hand, shushing her calmly and her soft 'I'm about to throw a fit' cry stopped right then, hearing her coo softly as she nuzzled against my shoulder and my heart completely melted. I never realized just how desperately I missed this feeling until I held a baby again._

_I continued to sit in the chair, still holding the baby girl as she then went back to sleep in my arms and I must've held her for about another twenty minutes.. I didn't want to put her back down.. I loved this feeling too much._

"Judith,"  _I heard the woman lying on the bed whisper to me and I looked her direction,_ "Her name is Judith,"  _she went on, seeing a gentle smile on her lips and I smirked back._

"Judith.. Lovely name,"  _I replied, but then realizing that I might be overstepping my bounds.. This woman barely knew me and I was holding her baby,_ "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.. She started crying and my wife always told me I had a way with putting our son to bed, so, it was purely instinctual,"  _I tried to make it seem like I wasn't this creepy stranger holding her baby._

"It's all right.. Is the woman you're with your wife?"  _She asked and I shook my head._

"No.. That's Piper, a good friend of mine.. My wife.. She, uhm.. She's no longer with us,"  _I said with a sorrowful smirk and I noticed her eyes go remorseful._

"I'm sorry to hear that.. What about your son? Where is he?"  _She wondered next and I broke eye contact with her, unknowingly holding her baby a little tighter to me in a protective, paternal way._

"I.. I don't know,"  _I answered just above a whisper._

"Oh.. I'm.. I'm sorry,"  _she replied, sitting up within the bed and I could tell that she hated herself for asking the questions she did now knowing the rather depressing answers._

"It's all right.. I haven't lost faith in trying to find him, I've just been severely distracted along the way with trying to survive in this hell heap,"  _I replied, gently pulling Judith away from my shoulder and handing her off towards her mother,_

"I know what that feels like,"  _she said with a soft, slightly pained voice and Judith began to start fussing again._

"I think she might be getting hungry.. I'll give you some privacy,"  _I replied, knowing she had to feed from the breast,_ "By the way, I'm Draic,"  _I added, putting back on my coat, sash and hat._

"I never thanked you, Draic.. So, thank you.. And I'm Edith, but, you can call me Eedie,"  _she said with a smile and I nodded._

"We'll, we're glad to help you and Judith any way we can, Eedie.. We'll be leaving the farm in about an hour, so rest up a little more and we'll be on our way to Sanctuary where you can get meds and a bath and food and anything else you need,"  _I replied and I watched as her eyes started to water a little._

"Thank you.. Thank you so very much,"  _she said again and I smiled, tipping my hat to her as I left her alone with her child and went to the common dining area to give them some privacy._

_\- - - - -_

_Around five in the evening, I found Blake again and decided to ask him something before we all headed on._

"Has Paladin Danse come through here by chance recently?"  _I asked, still referring to his rank in the Brotherhood, not wanting anyone else to know, if they didn't know already, that he was to be put to death by them if he'd ever been found. Even though these people followed me and trusted me, I didn't trust them enough to give them information like that that doesn't concern them._

"As a matter of fact, yeah, he got here around four or five in the morning. He stopped in for only a little while, then went on his way.. I think he went to Sanctuary Hills. He's been heading there alone quite a bit recently,"  _he replied, now knowing that Danse has been sneaking out without me knowing a lot more than I thought he had been.. But, why?_

"Haven't seen him come back this way yet, though.. He's probably still up there, since he always stops in whether he's coming or going."

"Thanks. We're heading there, ourselves, so maybe we'll run into him. And, as always, thank you for the hospitality. It's always appreciated and I hope your faith in the Minutemen is still as strong as the day I met you," _I_ _answered with a smile._

"My belief in you and what you're doing with them has never wavered, my friend. Be seeing you soon,"  _he replied with a smile back and I nodded before continuing on._

_After saying our goodbye's, we headed back out on the road, Eedie on my back as I carried her and Judith in Piper's arms. Eedie wanted to walk, solely for the fact that she was embarrassed that I had to carry her, but with what condition her feet were in, I refused it._

"How much longer, do you think?"  _Piper wondered, able to hear the concern in her tone for the baby and the amount of radiation it had. Breastfeeding from a radiated mother didn't help, either._

"Maybe another hour.. We still have to go passed the Red Rocket, but after that, it's only a fifteen minute walk or so.. Not much further.. Don't worry, they'll get the meds they both need and be completely fine,"  _I answered with a strong confidence and Piper looked to me with a smile, knowing she believed in me and we kept on going forward._

_Avoiding the path that led to the Museum of Freedom and the abandoned town of Concord was an absolute must. Raiders always flocked to abandoned towns such as Concord to try and find their own type of hierarchy and their blind need to rule something.. Raiders were uncontrollable, unpredictable and untrustworthy. There was no way in hell I'd ever take Eedie and Judith through there. Piper, Dogmeat and I could handle it, even it was ten against three, but with a frail young woman with clearly no fighting skills that had a baby? No chance in hell.. I led them straight North from Abernathy Farm, knowing that the open fields would be better with wildlife than walking through towns that we had no idea what kinds of humans they were inhabited by. It took about half an hour off of our walk, too._

_We approached the Red Rocket in about a half hour after leaving Abernathy Farm, the sky getting dark and the moon coming out to light the rest of the way for us and I was obligated to stop and chat with some of the settlers. Like Piper said, I needed to put being a 'leader' in their eyes first and looking for Danse second. I let Eedie and Judith rest for another few minutes or so, the people of Red Rocket nice enough to offer us fresh water and some food, obliging to the best of our ability even though we had just been rejuvenated at the Abernathy Farm, but I couldn't say no.. This is another thing I hated about being what I was.. I had to make appearances, be polite.. Piper was right.. Even the two settlements that we had passed just to get to Sanctuary held me at such a high regard that I had to keep up the 'face' for the Minutemen and I had to wear what I was wearing. I could see in all of their eyes that seeing me in the flesh after weeks of not visiting was a breath of fresh air for them. But, for me? I honestly hated it, only because from what Blake said and how he knew that Danse was at Sanctuary. He was only a fifteen minute walk from me and I couldn't bare not continuing on just to see his face._

_After letting Eedie get a little more rest for about fifteen minutes, I called it quits and we continued on. I couldn't **not.** I had to see Danse and know that he was okay._

_\- - - - -_

"Are you excited?"  _Piper questioned, knowing what she was asking and I chuckled, though not particularly wanting to talk about this now that Eedie was awake as I carried her._

"Yeah.. I haven't been to Sanctuary in forever, it seems,"  _I played off as if I weren't more excited to see Danse and I heard her chuckle._

"You know what I mean, Drai-"

"Yeah, I know.. And yes, I am,"  _I cut her off, side-eyeing her and she continued her smile as she raised her brows momentarily, now knowing she knew I didn't want to talk about Danse._

_Silence held over the next ten minutes of the walk, no need for further conversation or even small talk, the exact kind of silence I loved with my best friend, Piper. Content, not awkward, silence._

_When we saw the bridge that led straight over to Sanctuary, my heart started to beat quicker and without even noticing, my pace had quickened just slightly._

"Even in the moonlight, I can see your cheeks are pink,"  _Piper whispered and I scoffed._

"Shut up,"  _I quickly retorted and she chuckled as we walked over it and approached the first few houses that were still abandoned that were left alone. When first deciding how to restore the town, it was in the best interest of the town to avoid fixing up the houses that couldn't be restored. The first few still looked abandoned, but once you took the curve to the right following the trail into Sanctuary, that's where you saw the town come to life when you were greeted by a large gate. But, it looked different.._ _The last time I was here, there weren't green, luscious trees beyond the gate's opening like there were now, let alone lights accompanying said trees.. Now I couldn't remember the last time I had been here.. Where did these trees come from? These lights? This enormous inviting feeling I had never felt before when I first reconstructed the town? It was.. It was beautiful.. I could feel goosebumps forming on my arms._

"General Draic!"  _I heard Sturges call out from our right where he usually was in the first home you'd come across that I had fashioned into a huge body-mech shop for him._

"Can you stand?"  _I quickly asked Eedie and I felt her nod against my shoulder, slowly lowering her down and off of my back and once I knew she was okay, I hastily walked towards Sturges._

"W-What? What is all of this? It's-,"  _I was at a loss for words,_ "..It's beautiful,"  _I said as if I was dumbfounded, which I was, and I watched as his smile grew more than I had ever seen and he laughed._

"Yeah, it's nice, right? Danse did a good job. Sanctuary now looks like it's literally a sanctuary,"  _he replied, my eyes still focused on the pathway, but what he said caught my attention and I looked to him with a curious, raised brow._

"Danse? ..Is he here now?"  _I asked and I watched him nod._

"Yeah! Buddy is in your old homestead.. But, I've been told many times,  **if he comes here looking for me, don't let him inside,** he's told me to say,"  _he recited and I glanced over towards my old house.. My two hundred year old house.. I could see lights on inside, but, if Sturges was quoting Danse like I knew he was, I would do as he said._

"Okay.. But, this? H-How.. How did he..? How did he do all of this? Where did these trees come from?" 

"What? Are you kidding? My man's been farming corn for a while, but, you didn't know how much of a green thumb the dude actually had, did'ja?"  _He said with a laugh,_ "He redid the soil along the walkway, found these nice trees and brought them here.. Replanted them and hey! Look! They're still fine, even after attaching lights to 'em.. Guys got a gift,"  _Sturges said with his naturally cocky smile as if he did it all himself. This was.. This was amazing.._

"Who's the little lady and the babe? ..And I ain't talkin' about you, Pipes,"  _he winked Piper's way and she scoffed, letting them talk as I still marveled in what, apparently, Danse had been creating. I couldn't take my eyes off of it all._

"Found her and the little one in an abandoned bus just South of Abernathy.. They're both in need of rad-away, though, and lots of it.. Food, bath, the works.. Can you help?"  _She asked and he nodded._

"Of course! Come this way.. Mama Murphy will know what to do,"  _he replied_ _and as I stared at the walkway some more, I blindly followed Sturges and Piper by the sound of their footsteps._

_Once I snapped out of some sort of romantic-gesture trance, looking away from the trees and the lights, we found Mama Murphy and let her know the extent of medical attention Eedie and Judith needed. Mama Murphy agreed to help them instantly and brought them out of the common area and towards one of the houses that we had made into a medical center._

_When they were gone with Mama Murphy, I looked back to Piper, my eyes still showing signs of amazement and I watched her smile,_ "You knew the whole time, didn't you?"  _I asked and she laughed._

"Of course I did, stupid.. But, there was no way I was going to tell you about a surprise like this,"  _she said with a continued, huge smile._

"What's all of this for, anyways? Did he just feel like doing it one day randomly?"  _I wondered next and she shook her head._

"It's for your birthday, sweetie.. Even though Danse, as well as the rest of us, don't know exactly what day it is, we still know it was within this week, at least.. We've managed to narrow it down to the month and the week, just not the exact day, since you don't talk about it much.. So.. Happy birthday, babe,"  _she said with a wide smile and I could feel my eyes starting to tear up, but I nodded and quickly went to her, hugging her strongly within my grasp and I felt her hold me just as strongly back._

"Thank you for not telling me.. It was a wonderful surprise,"  _I answered and she held me just a little bit tighter._

"No problem,"  _she replied and pulled away,_  "Now, wait here! He'll be here soon, I'm sure, to show you the rest of what he did,"  _she replied, giving me a soft pat on the shoulder as she then left me and went to the medical center where Mama Murphy had take Eedie and Judith, leaving me in the common area alone._

 

**Author's Note:**

> rinntarouu.tumblr.com/tagged/youtalkinyoursleep


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